TIFU by making myself look like a lunatic because Jesus is dead

Obligatory: this wasn’t really today, but actually more than a decade ago. I remember my sister had just gotten her driver’s license, so I was 14. It was during summer break. My dad was probably working, my sister drove my mom to the mall, and I was home trying to have a lazy day playing PlayStation.

We live in an apartment building with the mailboxes indoors on the first floor. When the doorbell rang, I assumed it was just someone delivering free newspaper ads. Everyone in my family has a key anyway, so I ignored it.

Ding dong again.
Okay, maybe my mom and sister bought a lot of stuff and need help carrying groceries. Out of habit, I check through the peephole first—and it’s two guys in suits. Now I start thinking it might be important.

I open the door. One of them starts rambling something like, “Someone who was a great person and very important to all of us has died.” I’m confused—maybe someone in my extended family actually died—get handed a flyer, and they leave.

I look at the flyer. Bold letters: “JESUS IS DEAD.”
Ah, Jehovah’s Witnesses. I was kinda worried for a second and kinda annoyed, but fine, whatever… back to PlayStation.

A little later: ding dong again.
I don’t check the peephole this time and just open the door, since how likely is it to be something stupid again… Aaaaand it’s the same two guys. They see me, apologize, and leave, but I notice they walk upstairs instead of down, so they are trying to bother other neighbors who haven’t opened the door yet.

Ding dong. Again.
I’m annoyed. Everyone important has a key. I know the two cultists are persistent, might still be in the building, and are too stupid to track who they already talked to. The last time, I opened without checking. I just want to play PlayStation and won’t repeat this mistake again. So I choose to ignore it.

One minute later: ding dong. Again.
Pissed and ready to chew them out in my puberty-induced rage to stop ringing my doorbell, I look through the peephole first—nobody. I try the more-or-less freshly fixed intercom—nothing, maybe it’s broken again. I peek through the window… it’s my sister. She’s asking why I won’t answer the door. I try yelling that the intercom is probably broken again and I thought it was Jehovah’s Witnesses again. She can’t understand me and just screams, “WHAT???” repeatedly.

Like I said, I was already annoyed by the constant ringing and increasingly frustrated trying to explain louder and louder. I put all my power into my voice and scream out the window:

“JESUS IS DEAD!!!”

I’m sure my voice was still filled with annoyance and slightly cracking because, well, puberty, and therefore sounded extremely dramatic. My sister laughed for like an hour straight because that was the absolute last thing she expected to hear me yell across the street—especially with this much emotion, while I, didn’t give a crap about religion. She was mocking me quite a while for this one.

TL;DR: Two persistent Jehovah’s Witnesses keep ringing my door. My sister rings later and doesn’t understand me. I grow frustrated and scream “JESUS IS DEAD!!!” out the window like a lunatic, after reading it from one of the cultists’ flyers and get mocked by my sister.