greenmangostudio

So , since early December , my grandma has been a resident at the local nursing and rehab home. Honestly , it's less of a medical center and more of a departure lounge for the ' Great Beyond ' and the gossip there is top tier. Thankfully for us , the place is located quite literally right across the street from my house. My commute there is approximately fourty-five seconds if im walking. Because of the geographic convenience , ive been visiting her every day for the last two months. Ive become such a fixture in that building that im basically the facility's emotional support human , minus the uniform and credentials and I have significantly more existential dread than the rest of the employees. In that time ive managed to socialize my way into the good graces of the entire ecosystem. Im tight with the doctors , the nurses , aides and a rotating cast of residents who are all charmingly one foot in the grave already. Now you think a nursing home would be a place of pe...

So I very awkwardly taught my nephew, the word chlamydia the other day and not in the way that you would think… It was actually very innocent. I was with one of my sister’s friends and my friends who’s become part of the family and I was telling her about an interesting fact, not thinking about how my nephew was right beside us. I told her did you know that koalas can get chlamydia and that they can give it to humans… just a fun fact… and then he who can barely say clear words most of the time clearest day said koala chlamydia so that happened And he went to his grandmother’s house today, so I’m kinda hoping he doesn’t say that, but at the same time I would die laughter and about pee my pants if he did because holy crap, how do you react to that? TL:DR I shared a fact about koalas and my nephew hung on to two words from the sentence. Those two words which he repeated were koala chlamydia.

so I (19f) went over to my boyfriend's (19m) to spend Valentine's day together. I bought a tesco meal to chuck in the oven since I've started a new job which means waking up at 4am. I don't usually cook at his place as I feel comfier cooking homemade meals at home. anyways, I bought camembert for a starter, lasagne and chips for a main, and a brownie pudding for dessert. I time everything perfectly and the cheese comes out. we go to dig in and it's a bit more solid than usual, but we finish it anyway. then comes the main and the chips were solid, and the lasagne was lukewarm?? we power through it, but leave some of the main. me n bf were discussing the meal afterwards and I talk about the setting I put it on and maybe It was the wrong one. He goes down to check and we finally learn why (t)ifu. The. oven. wasn't. actually. on. I never pressed the middle button to turn it on. We had room temp food. We never actually had the dessert either because we were so f...

This actually happened today, and I still want to disappear. We had our weekly team meeting at work. Nothing special — just updates, deadlines, and a small presentation from my boss about upcoming changes. At some point, he mentioned that our deadline for a client project was next Friday. I instantly felt that spike of confidence because I clearly remembered it being this Friday. I had even told a coworker earlier that we were running out of time. Instead of double-checking or asking politely, I interrupted him mid-sentence and said, “Actually, the deadline is this Friday. We’re already behind.” The room went quiet. He paused, looked at me, and calmly said, “Are you sure?” I doubled down. I even said I had checked the email myself. So he pulled it up on the screen. In front of everyone. And there it was. Clear as day. “Due: Next Friday.” Turns out I had mixed it up with another project. Not only was I wrong, but I also looked arrogant and unprepared. My boss handled it profess...

I wanted my lashes to be "unshakeable." I bought a glue used by drag queens—literally "the stuff that stays on through a hurricane." I applied my lashes and went to a rooftop bar for a first date. The wind was insane. About twenty minutes in, a huge gust hit us. The glue was so strong that the lash didn't fly off; instead, it acted like a tiny sail. It pulled my actual eyelid upward and stayed there. I couldn't blink my left eye. My eyelid was literally stuck in a "perma-wink" position. I spent the rest of the date trying to look "mysterious" while my left eye was wide open and watering uncontrollably. My date asked if I was "having a stroke." When I got home, it took three different types of oil and two hours of crying to get them off. I lost nearly all my natural lashes on that eye. TL;DR: Used glue that was too strong; a gust of wind turned my fake lashes into a sail and pinned my eyelid open for the duration of a first d...

I was invited to be a "background student" for a famous yoga influencer’s new YouTube series. I wore my "cute" black leggings. Under normal lighting, they look fine. Under the 50,000-watt studio lights they use for filming, they were basically a window. We were doing "Downward Dog" for about 10 minutes. I was feeling great, really "in the zone." After the take, the cameraman (a guy in his 20s) looked at the floor and refused to make eye contact. The influencer pulled me aside and whispered, "Hey, just so you know... the camera can see your exact brand of underwear and your birthmark. We have to reshoot the whole segment." I had to put on a pair of borrowed, sweaty "loaner" shorts over my leggings. I am now forever immortalized in the "Bloopers" reel as the girl whose leggings were essentially a screen door. TL;DR: Wore transparent leggings to a high-def film shoot; gave the entire production crew a detailed anato...