greenmangostudio

This happened a few days ago. My work paid for a +1 event at a sports game. I remember hearing that my coworker usually came to the games with her dad, so I believe this contributed to the mental gymnastics that my brain decided to perform... I saw my coworker with with a girl and convinced myself that this was her mom because, of course she could only possibly be there with one of her parents, right? Totally...... I had a couple of drinks and I was super tired after a long work week, so this didn't help me maintain my normal social filter. When I stopped by where my coworker and her friend were sitting, instead of introducing my myself like a normal human being, I decided to ask my coworker, "is this your mom?" right in front of both of them. I am just...so stupid sometimes... My coworker laughed it off thankfully. She imitated her friend saying, "I'm leaving!" and replied to me, "No, haha... this is my friend." I apologized profusely and expla...

I recently attended a 4-day wedding. Met a guy on the first day and instantly hit it off. We spent the rest of the wedding hanging out and yesterday, his last night here, I went back to his hotel room. We had sex, it was great, slept for a couple hours, woke up and were at it again. He asked me to turn around like in a sexy commanding way and idk wtf was going through my mind (probably lack of sleep and alcohol) but I started singing (I can’t sing) “Every now and then I get a little bit lonely.” The guy was like ?????? I apologized and explained it’s a song. He was like okkaaaaay in a weirded out way but to his credit, was still down to smash. So he is hitting it from behind and idk why but I brought up the song again, saying it’s a classic and he’d like it. And randomly remembered a similar incident with my ex (not during sex) where he had jumped in and we sang the song together. Honestly a really nice memory that made me miss my ex and I started crying!!!!!!!!!!!! The guy immedia...

My gf and I moved into our new apartment recently. We had sex. As couples do. A few days later, I got home from work and found my gf waiting for me with a handwritten letter in her hand. She said someone slipped the letter underneath our front door while no one was home. Then she read the letter out loud. It said EVERYONE in the apartment building could hear us having sex. It was signed "apartment 6." My gf and I were embarrassed and debated whether we should go to apartment 6 and apologise. I decided it was the perfect situation for me to show my gf that I'm an adult, so I said I was gonna go to apartment 6 and clear the air. Fast forward to me knocking on apartment 6. The door opened. A jacked gym bro looking dude appeared in front of me. I introduced myself and said I moved in next door. The gym bro welcomed me to the apartment and asked if I wanted to come in. I said it was okay and apologised for the noises he heard. The gym bro looked confused and asked what I wa...

This did actually happen today. I got myself one of those Nasalfresh MD things, basically a sinus flushing system that both pushes water in and sucks it out the other side into a waste water tank. Figured it'd work better if my sinuses were stuffed up to where a regular neti pot just didn't work. Been using a neti pot for years as I have seasonal allergies and using it daily/every other day really helps. Anyway, part of the instructions for this thing say to use the 'gentle' mode for the first month then work up. The third mode is called power wash in the manual. So, I read the instructions, watch the videos, get all set up, turn it on and...not much happens. I can feel a little suction but can't feel the salt water moving. I take the thing out of my nose, just press the button and wait to see how the water flows. It seems to be sort of trickling out, which seems weird. But, ok, water is flowing, I just need to be patient and my nose is a little stuffed up any...

I was making my toddler and myself lunch, and rushing as usual because she’s always hurrying to eat. I was trying to avoid the wrath of the bully and instead bullied myself I was trying to pull a spoon out of the drawer and close it quickly. I somehow hooked the inner part of my index finger on a fork while the drawer was closing, lifting the fork and increasing the pressure of it. I managed to open the drawer after a few seconds of excruciating pain. The fork scraped layers of skin away until it got down to the meat… I couldn’t stand to wash it so i put a band aid on as fast as humanely possible. I’m scared of my utensil drawer now. I don’t even understand how this happened to me TLDR: a fork got caught on my finger and scraped layers off.. it hurts.

Quick update to my own dumb story from last week: I decided to get extra organized for our next Florida park day. Between school drop offs, work, and trying to keep the grocery bill from becoming a horror story, I started a Sunday routine of portioning everything into grab-and-go bags. I even made a little offline checklist on my phone with sections like "car snacks", "stroller bin", and "emergency bribery". I felt pretty proud of myself. Earlier, I had bought whole espresso beans for my mornings and left the bag on the same counter where I was assembling snack packs. I meant to move it. I did not move it. Fast forward to today: we are running late, everyone is hungry, and we are stuck in the car line at school. My kid asks for a snack. I reach into the tote I packed, grab what I assume is a bag of chocolate covered something, and hand it over without looking because I am also trying to find a missing water bottle and sign a field trip form on my knee. ...