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TIFU by asking for the number of a trainee

So to keep it vague for privacy reasons, I'll say that I (F,30s) work with a company that goes to different locations and trains people within a program. The people we train can only take the course once. I've done this job for a year now and I've never seen a past trainee again, even though we go to the same locations. **Also Im a worker in the program, I'm not a lead or authoritative role. So a few weeks ago, there was a trainee (M,30s) who was cute and was giving me signs: touching my arm several times, heavy eye contact, going out of the way to thank me for small things. Didn't do that with others. My coworkers were like "hes cute, ask him out!" I was weary at first. Lowkey shy, I never ask guys out. I thought if he asked me for my number, id give it. At the end of training he touched my arm again. But since the training was over and we were leaving, I thought fuck it. I asked him for his number (he confirmed he was single). And after he gave it, our...

TIFU by trying to prove my smoke alarm was too sensitive and accidentally proving it worked perfectly

Obligatory this happened yesterday, and my apartment still smells faintly like burnt confidence. I have a smoke alarm right outside my kitchen that goes off constantly. Toast slightly too dark? Screaming. Oven door open for three seconds? Screaming. Boiling water with too much personality? Somehow also screaming. Yesterday I was making a grilled cheese and it started going off again before anything was even smoking. I got annoyed and told my girlfriend that the alarm was basically useless because it reacted to everything. She said, “Maybe it’s just doing its job.” For some reason, I decided this was the moment to defend my honor against a plastic ceiling circle. I said I could prove it was too sensitive. My plan was to make another grilled cheese the exact same way, keep the window open, fan running, everything normal, and show that it would still go off for no real reason. Except while I was explaining this very smart experiment, I forgot the pan was already heating. The...

TIFU by pretending I understood my landlord’s repair instructions and flooding my bathroom

Obligatory this happened yesterday, but I’m still dealing with the aftermath. I rent a small apartment and my bathroom sink has been draining slowly for about two weeks. Not fully clogged, just slow enough to be annoying. I texted my landlord about it and he said he could come by next week, but if I wanted to try the “easy fix,” I could loosen the little trap pipe under the sink and clear it out. He sent me a short video. It looked simple. Too simple, actually. Guy in the video puts a bowl under the pipe, twists two plastic rings, removes some gross hair, puts it back together. Done. My landlord asked if I was comfortable doing that or if I’d rather wait. For some reason, my stupid pride took control and I said, “yeah no problem, I’ve done this before.” I had not done this before. I put a cereal bowl under the pipe because apparently I thought plumbing problems produce soup portions of water. I loosened the first ring. Nothing happened. I loosened the second one and the whole...

TIFU by eating chocolate covered pretzels

I am on maternity leave and spend a lot of my time these days sitting on the couch with my baby. I also have a cat. Earlier today, I was eating chocolate covered pretzels on the couch. A few hours later I noticed a little piece of chocolate on the couch cushion that must have flaked off one of the pretzels. I didn’t want it to melt into the couch, but I was holding a napping baby, so getting up to throw it away wasn’t an option. I could have let it sit there until the nap was over, but for some reason I thought… I’ll just put it in my mouth. As soon as I bit down it was immediately apparent that I was not, in fact, chewing on a small piece of chocolate. Can you tell where this is going? Yeah, it was cat poop. I put a piece of cat poop in my mouth. TL;DR Ate a small piece of chocolate off the couch but it was actually cat poop.

TIFU By Pavloving my brain into curing my migraines in a disgusting way

This didn't happen today but was a gradual FU years in the making So for context I have been getting migraines Irregularly for about ten years now. Tried everything under the sun, changed diets, changed work locations, changed colognes, nothing worked and then they would randomly go away and randomly come back so whatever. Years later they got rated as service connected for my military service and I got prescribed a rescue medication so at least I had something to take while I was in the middle of one. Years go by and some times I would have them frequently, sometimes I would only get a few a month but the most frequent were waking in the middle of the night with one. To avoid disturbing my wife I would pop one of the pills, go to the bathroom, and browse my phone on the toilet till the pill took effect. Well eventually my brain connected toilet and migraine but forgot to add the pill connection so now I can feel a migraine coming on and guess what, I usually need to take a bat...

TIFU I got scammed due to my stupidity

I know that you should never share your card details with anyone. Never did before today despite many scamming attempts. But today I messed up. Here's how it happened - I recently filed a complaint to a government authority in my country. I received a call today claiming that they resolved my issue and I'd get compensation. Then they asked for my banking details. Till that part things seemed normal. But then they suddenly asked for my card details saying transaction would require those. They were talking very authoritatively and started pressuring me citing time. They said they can't call me again and if I wanted the compensation I had to give my details. I really don’t know why I ignored the alarm bells in my head, went ahead and gave them my details. Then I got a message saying money was transferred from my account and I realized I fucked up. I called the bank immediately and told them to stop all transactions. Luckily they didn’t get all my money and the damage is somewh...