greenmangostudio

Obligatory didn't happen today. So I was leaving my apartment for what I thought would be 4-5 days max due to a minor finger surgery (I was going to stay with my relatives because I knew I'd need support). Before going out, I looked at the trash bag ready for takeout in the main corridor, and decided I'll take that out when I'm back. Well the surgery didn't go as routine as expected, and long story short, I was gone for almost three weeks. In the middle of a heatwave. Cue to me coming back after three weeks, not expecting anything bad. It was already evening and dark. I came back, went straight to the living room, put down my bag... And noticed a fly. Okay, no biggie. I slapped that one. Then I saw another. At this point, I look closer at the glass door leading outside... To see at least 5 more right in front of me. I thought it's weird, but it still didn't click. I notice that the door is somewhat a LOT more dirty than I remembered, which I ...

So lately, I've gotten into light baking. Nothing crazy just cookies and loaves. We've had a surpluss of carrots, so I decided to make carrot cake bread loaf thing. The first batch was great. Between my wife and our two housemates, it disappeared quickly. I decided to make another batch last night, but this time, with freshly made cannabis infused butter. Nothing too crazy strong but infused nonetheless. I told one of my housemates about it, though I didn't see their partner at all so didn't get the chance to tell them. When I got up thing morning there was a sizable chunk missing. Like four times as much as I had ate the night before. My heart immediately sank. It's fine that it got eaten since I made it for everyone but it seemed a bit early for anyone to have some. I know my wife didn't, so I asked the housemate that I told about the cannabis if they had any. They did not. They also forgot I put cannabis in it and thanked me before they got a chance to sn...

It happened literally two hours ago. I'm still sitting in the office toilet, looking at my resignation letter and wondering if I should change my name and country of residence. A little context: my cat (his name is Lucifer, and he fully justifies his name) has started having digestive problems. The vet told me over the phone: "Listen, if he can't go to the toilet again, you'll have to give him a light tummy massage and... um, check for any lumps on his back. If anything, take a picture and send it to me on Telegram, and I'll tell you if everything's okay." Like a caring cat dad, I run home from work during my lunch break. Lucifer screams. I understand - it's time to act. I put my phone on the washing machine, turn on the flashlight, take the cat, and perform this procedure that is as humiliating for both of us as possible. I take a quick macro photo of the "problem area" under his tail to send to the doctor. And here my brain decided to...

We were at Starbucks and my coworker rang up a lady for a refresher and she was short 3 cents because her free voucher only covered up to $7.50. I wasn’t paying attention at first because I was making food but I noticed when she walked off and my coworker had to tell her to finish the payment. Then she came back realizing she didn’t have the rest and said “Well y’all have 3 cents in there 👀” and she gestured to the tip jar. The person ringing her was new so she was kinda confused and looked to me and I said sorry we can’t do that. Then she stormed off to call someone to Venmo her. Anyway, she called back the next shift after I left and complained that we were rude and basically made her feel judged (seemingly for being a brokie that doesn’t have 3 cents). She got promised a free drink next time. My manager spam called to confront me. I explained the situation then I got chewed out because I should have let her slide for the measly change. Sometimes our boss likes to cover people’s ...

I’m the only woman in my office, which means the women’s bathroom is my private bathroom. That sounds great until something goes wrong and there is exactly one suspect. Today, I clogged the toilet. I flushed, watched the water rise, and immediately realized there was no way to blame this on anyone else or skedaddle out of there. To make matters worse, there was no plunger in the bathroom. My options were to tell one of my male coworkers that the women’s toilet was clogged, knowing they would instantly know it was me, or solve the problem myself. So, in a moment of pure panic and terrible judgment, I used my hand. I will spare you the details, but it worked. I washed my hands so many times that I may no longer have fingerprints. Which will be great should I need to flee the country and start a new life under an assumed identity. I returned to my desk acting completely normal, while internally processing the fact that I had just reached into a toilet to protect my professiona...

Man, they come out of those dispensers fast, eh? My fiancee and I went to Winco yesterday and I have been craving jelly beans like nobody's business. I saw they had giant dispensers with all the flavors I wanted!! Watermelon, buttered popcorn, black licorice, cotton candy, I was in heaven! But pulling the handle on the coffee-style dispensers allowed WAY more to come through than I anticipated. Which, is fine. I can eat a lot of jelly beans and we don't have a candy store near us so when will I have this chance again? Well, I ended up with 3.27 pounds (or 1.36 kilo) of jelly beans 😬 I bought my groceries, paid $92 for it all. $30 is just jelly beans. So I'll be snacking on these for a while.... My best friend said they're going to write math problems about me. 🥴 TL;DR I spent $30 on jelly beans due to my ignorance and strength.