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TIFU after leaving my mic unmuted during my online maths lecture.

I was taking my maths lecture online today since it had been raining heavily the entire day and transport was an inconvenience. I was the only student online while the other students of varying years sat offline. The teacher uses a tablet for conducting the classes and the volume is generally turned up for everyone to hear, not very loud but the space in which she teaches is small and the sound reaches just about every corner of the room. The class had been going normally, I had been solving some questions with my mic (from what I'd presumed) muted. Just then, through the halfway mark of the lecture, my brother came into my room and insisted that he was going to continue with his work on my study table. I disagred obviously, and he became rudely adamant about doing so and accepting nothing else. I grew frustrated and started shouting at him, venting out my anger from earlier in the day as well. It got to a point that we both got sidelined and just started violently dissing at eac...

TIFU by forgetting my sister is banned from my office and accidentally triggering a workplace lockdown

Obligatory this didn't happen to my sister, it happened to me, and it happened about three hours ago. I am still sitting in my car breathing into a paper bag. For some background context, my older sister "Clara" has a bizarre habit of mimicking me. It went so far last month that she dressed like me, took my spare keycard, and tried to sit at my corporate desk for four hours doing nothing. My company had to issue a formal trespass order against her, and security has her photo at the front desk. Because of this and other family drama, I am currently staying at a motel. Here is where I fucked up. I work a hybrid schedule. Today was my day to work from my motel room, but I realized I left a folder with incredibly important client signatures back at my actual office desk. I was in a massive rush because my boss needed the data by noon. I threw on a gray hoodie, swept my hair up into a messy bun, and ran out the door. When I arrived at my office building, I completely f...

TIFU by giving my neighbor a cat feeder that still had my voice in it

My cat stopped using his automatic feeder after I changed his food, so I cleaned it out and shoved it in a kitchen cabinet. It sat there forgotten for probably six months before a woman in my building mentioned she had just adopted a cat, and I offered it to her. I completely forgot that I had recorded a custom message on it. Every morning at 6 it plays me saying, wake up you unemployed little goblin, your government assistance has arrived. Apparently the first time it happened she thought somebody was speaking through her baby monitor. The second morning she unplugged the monitor and still heard it, so she started checking every room because she thought someone had gotten inside her apartment. She finally figured out it was the feeder after standing next to it at exactly 6 in morning. She knocked on my door holding it and asked why my voice was insulting her cat before sunrise. I deleted the recording but now we have to see each other in the elevator knowing she spent mornin...

TIFU by being homophobic while trying to hit on a girl

So after weeks of being home depressed as hell, I decided today to get out of the house, get nicely dressed and go alone to this cool jazz event I found on Instagram. The event was incredibly fun like people playing jazz in a park and everyone dancing and singing along. I was really feeling the music and then I lock eyes with this gorgeous girl at the other end of the park that was dancing as hard as I was. In retrospect she was probably just having fun, but we do make eye contact multiple times and I'm really feeling her. When the concert ends, I happen to randomly meet some old friends from school, and she just joins her group of friends. Fast forward like a couple hours, right before I'm about to leave, I think "I should really go talk to her", like why not? I'm used to talking to girls when I feel there could be a connection, that's how I met all my exs. What could go wrong? Everything did. As I approach this BIG group of people chilling in a circle,...

TIFU by speaking on the PA system on 5 hours of sleep

So I, 17F, work at an outdoor pool as a lifeguard. I also teach piano lessons part time during the summer, and somehow still go to the gym and see my friends. My pools name is Albert Cross Schooly Pool (First two words are fake, but “schooly pool” is important for story purposes). Yesterday I was at work doing a 9 Hour shift, (12:00-9:00), and the night before I had only gotten around 5 hours of sleep. We were on heat alert where I live, and my coworkers and I were all exhausted, sweaty, and mentally drained by the time 9:00 rolled around. Now, to close the pool, we have a PA system. One of us has to do a small message around the lines of: “Attention Albert Cross Schooly Pool Swimmers, the pool is now closing. Please exit the pool and have a good evening”. On this particular night, I decided to do the closing message. That was a bad idea. Tiredly, thinking about nothing but wanting to go home, I say with full confidence into the mic: “Attention Albert Cross Pooly School Swimm...

TIFU by not realising my account was hacked

So the other day I got an email saying that someone had entered my League of Legends account. I just changed my password and didn't think that much of it. I just thought that person was bored and wanted to play some ARAMS. Today I entered Reddit to check on the clash of critters community to see some tips to improve my gold rush formations. I was surprised to have more than 50 notifications and I didn't know why. I went to check what was happening and I saw some posts on my account saying I was a female who wanted some NSFW pictures in examge for some 😺pictures. I have a lot of DMs asking to see my 😺. Listen, I don't have a problem with horny people, we all should explore and enjoy, but I'm a cis man, I don't have a vagina, and I don't want to see some random men nudes, I'm not particularly fond of that content. I'm so sorry for the people that wrote me to get some action, I don't want that, I hope you'll find people you can examge pictur...