greenmangostudio

I was scrolling Instagram and someone put in their story a post about their dog passing. I put a remorseful emoji and kept scrolling. The next Instagram story was a photo of a friends sandwich. He’s my good buddy and we make stupid jokes all the time. I thought I wrote “stop, I can only get so erect” on the picture of his sandwich. Apparently at some point I put pressure on my cracked phone and it scrolled to the previous IG story about a dead dog.. so now my former co-worker thinks my response to her dog passing is “stop, I can only get so erect”. Now I know if I’m going to type something absolutely inappropriate, I should probably just find the profile and type it separately to avoid this in the future. TL;DR: doublecheck which stories you’re replying to. Someone thinks their dog passing gets me rock hard.

So I had this friend who suddenly got mad at me because she thought I was making fun of her over a 2-point deduction on her score. The thing is, I didn’t even realize she was already irritated at that time. From my perspective, everything was normal and I had no idea she was upset.Then at one point, I tried to grab her (just casually, not aggressively), but she forcefully pushed my hand away. She looked annoyed and said, “Why are you making a big deal over just a 2-point deduction?” That honestly caught me off guard because I didn’t even think I was making it a big deal.I was confused and thinking, “Wait, what? Why is she mad at me?” I didn’t even get the chance to explain myself properly. But instead of asking what was going on, my pride kicked in. I got defensive and just thought, “Whatever, I don’t have time to deal with this.” After that, she completely ignored me, and now I’m left confused about what actually happened. I feel like it was just a misunderstanding, but things escala...

This actually happened to me today, and while I laugh off the pain I thought I'd at least share my tale of woes with the world. My partner and I (24F) go to sleep naked. If we have nothing in particular to do that day, we'll often hang out around our place naked. We aren't nudists, we're just comfortable together and like oogling at one another. I've been into baking sourdough lately and when I got out of bed this morning, without bothering to put on clothes, I went to go preheat the oven to fire up the dough I made yesterday that's ready to go. If you know anything about sourdough you know how hot the oven needs to be to bake properly (425-450°F). For context, my boobs have a tendency to "lay low". They're not quite wobbling to my toes, but i definitely have a bigger chest at 38F (reduction on the way thankfully, also don't ask for pictures you weirdos). Unfortunately they're affected by gravity and definitely on the saggy side . When ...

So this didn’t happen today but about a month ago. In 2017 I dated this guy, S for about 3 years and we “broke up” around June 2020. I say “broke up” because I ghosted him because he was stationed in Japan and I had just moved out of our home state. I just didn’t want to have the hard conversation. Well over the last 6 years I’ve gotten a couple of drunk texts with him but I was in a not so great relationship at the time and just blocked him(he got 2 different numbers because of moving around). Well, in the last drunk text he sent me in 2024, it was a voice message from him along the lines saying “I’m sorry for whatever it was I’ve done and I know it’s bad to reach out like this but I just wanted to let you know I’m sorry and I’ll never contact you again”. I ignored the message per usual but didn’t block him this time to see if he’d actually keep his word. Last year I finally got out of my toxic relationship and he stole my phone so I got a new one and I got a job opportunity in ano...

So this happened today... I was going to a friend place but I arrived early and he wasn't there. I should wait for 15 minutes because he went for grocery shopping. I decided to walk around to kill this time, and while walking I saw a building with no windows... absolutely 0 windows in a residential area. For me it was impossible and wanted to check if they have windows in the other side, went from the left side no window but the road was blocked (dead end) same when I went investigating the right side no window but couldn't reach the front side because there was a main road leading to a highway. I went back again to the initial place and stopped to think about the next steps. and 3 police show up : - Good afternoon Sir ! what are you doing here ? - Nothing special just walking - Ok ! but why did you stopped ? Now this is where TIFU, because I really wanted to give them a useful answer but I couldn't explain why I stopped... so I told them calmly : - Sorry Sir, but ...

First off, I want to apologize to the housekeepers who work at Bellagio. Obviously a throwaway…never thought I needed to post here. (Warning: contains gay sex.) I was in Vegas this weekend (no, nothing good ever comes of Vegas). After checking into the hotel room, I decided to play some slots in the casino. I was also kinda horny and knew there was a 99% chance of a hookup if I simply turned on Grindr. So I washed myself and headed downstairs to play some slots while I waited for a suitable companion for the night. On the way to the casino, I stopped at the gift shop (Tutto) opposite the elevators to grab Ice Breakers Mints (the round tin). It was highway robbery. I couldn’t believe how much they marked up a stupid thing of Ice Breakers. I was not going to let my money go to waste so I revenge ate the entire thing while playing slots. Then the right guy came along. He was also staying at the Bellagio, except he had a fountain view. So I ended up in his room for the hookup. My stom...