greenmangostudio

TL;DR I thought a coworker going to Cisco Live was going to see Sisqo, live. Not a f*ck-up from today, per se, but still a favorite TIFU story of mine. So this wasn't today, but this is still one of my favorite stories from my tech career. One of my first jobs out of college was at an enterprise tech review platform. I was bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, and ready to make my mark in a new industry (after all, I graduated with a degree in Middle Eastern Studies, so what the heck did I know?). My manager was having a conversation with one of my company's sales reps, and she was talking about how excited she was to go to Cisco Live in Germany. Exciting stuff, right? International travel, great people, fun after parties. What else could you ask for at a swanky tech conference? But in my millenial, non-initiated mind, I thought she was telling my manager that she was going to see Sisqo (of "Thong Song" fame) live. Trying to take part in the conversation, I exclaimed "...

This just happened this morning, and I’m low key freaking out. I was at the doctor’s office and some idiot left his car directly behind mine, idling with no one inside. I tried backing out several different ways but there was no way to do it without hitting the car. I waited, growing increasingly frustrated. I got out and went inside, asking the people in the lobby whose car it was and no one answered. By this time I was highly frustrated and, for some unknown reason, checked to see if the door was locked. It wasnt. I don’t know what came over me other than impulsivity and anger, but I got into the car drove it forward about 5 feet (just so I could get past it) and then parked it and got out. As I was getting into my car the owner returned. He could clearly see that his car had been moved and glared at me, I honestly can’t believe I did it. He could’ve shot me, thinking I was stealing his car. I’m in my 50s, and I’m wondering if my mind is starting to slip. TLDR: I got into a stran...

so im sitting there with his phone like an idiot just trying to fix his stupid message sync thing and hes making that loud ass coffee with the Nescafe machine he always uses and im half paying attention tapping random settings i dont even remember where exactly i was maybe notifications or accounts idk and then boom some message pops up with a name ive literally never seen before but theres a heart next to it which already feels off and my brain kinda lags for a sec like wait no thats prob nothing but i still tap it which yeah i know bad move but also it was RIGHT THERE and then its just… not normal texts like not even trying to hide it its full relationship stuff like miss you already and last night was perfect and im just staring like wtf am i even reading i actually thought for a second maybe its old or spam or something dumb but no dates are like recent recent he walks back in and i guess i looked weird bc he just goes what and i kinda freeze like i didnt plan this at all i just ...

I got a job offer, which I accepted Thursday night, and then I received two emails and a text about a background check and drug screen on Friday afternoon. I was expecting this. The emails and text were mostly duplicates of each other. However, only one email said that the drug screen had to be conducted within 72 hours after starting the background check, and that the labs are open M-F, 8-11am, walk-in only. I'm glad I caught this because if I had started the background check promptly Friday afternoon when I received it, I would only have had Monday morning. And I would rather not have risked that in case something comes up. I have vaped marijuana on and off, but it had been over a month since the last time I vaped. I did a home urine drug screen Friday just to be sure and it was negative. I over-worry about things, so I actually did another UDS from a different brand on Saturday. The first was a THC only test, and the second was a 20 panel one. That one was negative too. Howeve...

I (22F) have a cute tuxedo cat named Aki (2M) and he is what you call a bathroom cat. You need to poo? Hope you like having a lap buddy! Need to take a shower or a bath? not to fear, the lifeguard is on duty! not to mention that he tries to get cuddles and attention as you are drying off. One day as was taking a bath, Aki came in looking for his attention as usual. walking on the rim of the tub and whatnot. Well I noticed that he kept trying to drink my bath water but the water was too hot for his tiny tongue. Wanting to be a responsible mother, I took the bathtub that we use to rinse out her hair and filled it with fresh water from the faucet. And showed him that there was water in the cup. I repeated this a few times but thought nothing of it. Fast forward a month or so, and I come home from work to my mom asking, "You taught Aki how to drink from the cup, didn't you?". Apparently earlier that day, she was taking a bath and are residential pervert decided he was going...

Here we go. I am talking to this girl for few weeks, talk every day, call each other every few days and watch each other stream on Twitch. (Before someone said it, no subscribes for neither of us, so no money involve) Today i made the (very long) car ride to meet her. We met at a restaurant/brewhouse for lunch. i arrived earlier to drink a beer and calm myself since i was nervous. At my surprise, when she arrive we started to talk and laugh like old friends, no pressure, easy going talks. We take few more drinks and eat. At one point, we were talking about astrology signs, which we both doesn't believe about, and make fun of it. Since we both are dogs owners and and love dogs, i point out that my chinesse sign is dog, which i thought was just a small fun fact. She said she didn't know hers. I said "Oh well, i know yours, you're born around the same time of my sister. You're a monkey ohhooohhho". Yes. My stupid austitic ass called her a monkey. AND mimics ...