TIFU by accidentally shaving my friend’s head.

This happened a few days ago, so the cringe is still painfully fresh. I think I lost a friend, or at the very least earned some friendship exile for this one.

I am not a hairdresser, a barber or anything of the sort. I do occasionally cut my boyfriend’s hair when he wants simple things like cleaning up the sides. More recently, he asked me to buzz all of his hair off, which was nerve wracking. In the end it was fairly easy— just plug in the clippers and go to town.

My friend - let’s call her Dallas - texted me recently to ask if I would “shave her head”. I was surprised because Dallas has a beautiful head of hair and always takes great care of it. She also dyes it with fun colors and generally takes great care in her appearance. This should have been my first hint, but for whatever reason my idiot brain didn’t think to clarify the request. I just thought, “oh! Dallas wants to try something new!” She also went through a breakup recently so I thought maybe it was a fresh start thing. I told Dallas I would be willing to do it, but warned her that I only ever cut my boyfriend’s hair.

On the day of, she came to my apartment, brought me donuts. I had even asked her to buy some clipper oil because I figured for such an extensive job I should make sure the clippers were properly lubricated. We both chatted while I powered up the clippers.

I started shaving the baby hairs on the back of her neck and everything was going great. When her neck was pretty much good she asked me to square it up. That should have been a glaringly obvious clue, but once again I am an idiot. Thinking that I had better just get on with it, I tell her “I’m just gonna do it now,” and proceed to plunge the clippers into that beautiful mess of hair.

She let out a loud squeak and jerked forward, saying “mY WHOLE HEAD?!”

Of course I yanked the clippers back and stared at her, flabbergasted. I think I fumbled out some sort of confused version of “I thought that’s what you wanted??”

She insisted it was not what she wanted at all. I told her to stay calm and we should look in the mirror and try to problem solve and see if there was a simple way to fix it. The damage had definitely been done. She had a little neat rectangle of scalp on the bottom of her neck, a nice square bald spot.

She started to cry and I apologized, and offered to pay for her hair to be fixed by a professional. I apologized probably 30 times.

She seemed to calm down a little, until she started pulling chunks of hair out. Lots of it. Apparently I had also fucked up by shaving too high on her neck and got some of the long hair that Dallas had been growing out for years. That’s when the sobbing began.

At that point she gathered her stuff to run out, and I lamely asked her if she wanted her donuts back. She did not.

I still feel awful, even though it was really a miscommunication. Like I said, I’m not a hairdresser, not even a causal barber. I feel like I did everything I could to make it right. I even offered to go hat shopping with her and buy a hat for her that made her feel confident, but she turned me down. I’ve decided to give her some space.

The lesson here is don’t bite off more than you can chew… or shave off more than what your friend asked for.

TL;DR: my friend asked me to shave her head, which I interpreted as buzzing all of her hair off. She only wanted the back of her neck shaved. Now she has a bald spot.