Skip to main content

TIFUpate: allowing my coworker to set me up

TIFU by cooking a fancy dinner to impress my friends and failing miserably.

Today, I decided to host a dinner party and cook a three-course meal for my friends. I wanted to show off my cooking skills, so I spent all day researching recipes, picking out ingredients, and getting everything ready. I was feeling pretty confident that I was going to nail it.

I started with the appetizer—bruschetta. How hard could it be, right? I found a recipe that looked super simple, but I must’ve misread it because I ended up adding WAY too much garlic. It was like I had made a garlic paste with a bit of tomato thrown in. I tasted it, and my mouth was on fire. I tried to salvage it by adding more tomatoes, but it just made everything worse. So, I had to throw out the first batch and start over. That should’ve been my first red flag, but I pushed on.

Next up was the main course: roast chicken with roasted vegetables and homemade gravy. I thought this would be easy, but I didn’t account for the fact that my oven is tiny and couldn’t fit everything at once. I ended up trying to cook the chicken while making the vegetables on the stove. In the middle of juggling both, I forgot about the veggies and they ended up completely burnt. I had to toss them and quickly boil some potatoes to mash as a side instead.

Finally, I moved on to dessert: chocolate mousse. I’d made it before, so I thought I had it down. But, of course, I miscalculated the chill time. When I took it out, it was more like a thick pudding than a mousse. I tried to fix it by stirring in whipped cream, but it just turned into a gooey mess. By the time I was ready to serve it, it looked like something you'd find at the bottom of a trash can rather than something you'd eat.

When my friends showed up, I served everything with a smile, hoping they wouldn’t notice how bad it all turned out. But as soon as one of them took a bite of the chicken, they paused and said, “Uh, it’s really good, but what’s with the potatoes? They’re like cement!” I tried to laugh it off, but it was clear everything was a disaster. The mousse was the worst—one of my friends took a spoonful and asked, “What is this supposed to be?” I panicked and said, “It’s… a deconstructed mousse. Yeah, totally intentional.”

Everyone was polite, but I could tell they were struggling to pretend it was good. After dinner, they all left early, and I was left alone in the kitchen with a mountain of dirty dishes and half-eaten food. I ended up ordering a pizza for myself because I couldn’t bring myself to eat what I had made.

Later, one of my friends texted me, “Hey, the dinner was fun, but next time, let’s just order takeout, yeah?” And that’s when I realized I should’ve stuck to something simple like pasta or ordering pizza instead of trying to impress everyone with a fancy meal.

TL;DR: Cooked a fancy dinner for my friends, ended up with burnt vegetables, dry chicken, and sad mousse. Everyone pretended it was good, but I learned my lesson: never cook fancy again.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU almost so bad by not unlogging from this Reddit account

I use this Reddit account to mod r/hearhimfuck , watch my porn and answer NSFWAMA when I feel like it. I religiously log off completely after every time because I don't want my partner or anyone knowing about this account. It's the holidays and we are all busy so I had a quick session with myself and ran to get a shower and leave for another family Christmas dinner. My phone stayed in my purse the whole evening. By the end there's 6 of us left and we're sitting in the living room, having mellow conversation. Pets are discussed and photos shown. Someone asks about my dogs so I go fetch my phone and sit back on the couch. As soon as I unlock it, there's a full blown ANAL clip playing. Fortunately, the sound was off. I manage to turn the sound all the way down and shut the app without anyone seeing. TLDR; Iwas THIS close from having hardcore porn blasting surrounded by my parents, my partner, an aunt and a two cousins. I can't imagine the aftermath of what could...

TIFU by fucking my coworker

Happened a couple of days ago, but yeah, as the title says... Oops... We've worked together for about a year now; we've always been friendly, but I never really clocked her as a potential romantic option; she's my coworker, she had a boyfriend when we started working together, and to be honest I just thought she was completely out of my league: I'm a schlub and she is gorgeous So when she texts me asking if we want to hang out after work, I genuinely thought nothing untoward would happen; I thought we were just going to chill and watch cartoons; and for a while we were just having a nice platonic hangout. But we got very drunk, and eventually she was giving me the bedroom eyes and saying we should make out. I very emphatically said that was a bad idea, but she kissed me anyway, and at that point I really lost any semblance of self-restraint.. I am not proud of myself, at all. I can tell myself that she came onto me, but ultimately I also comepletly let it happen. No...

TIFU by shopping on Amazon

So I have an Amazon account, and a family. Anyhow, the person I'm seeing likes to do things with me... try new things if you know what I mean 😏 Recently I've ordered a few packages with adult toys, swing, etc. And... clone a willy. It came in yesterday while I was out. While I was out I got a notification that the cloning kit came in. I sent my son a text asking him to bring my Amazon package in. He said he had already. I didn't think much of it. Until last night when I went to go... use it. I asked my son where the package was on my way out the door. He asked "The plant stand or the cloning kit?". Mind you, the boxes DO NOT say what the contents are, nor were they opened. He must have realized what he said because my face is a goddam story book. I just stood there silent and shocked. He pointed towards the closet. This has been going on for ages, but he has NEVER indicated knowing what's in the packages. So now my teenage son knows his mom is a freak. ...