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TIFU by eating a lot of dried fruit

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TIFU by not paying attention while walking to work

So I start my daily 1.25 mile walk to work. It's been raining lately, but it was relatively dry. I'm looking down at my phone, trying to choose some Warhammer lore to listen to on my journey when I get to the point where I pass by the grate of a storm drain in front of a warehouse.

One spot.

One spot on my path was not at all dry.

Now I'm finding my foot sliding in a direction it is absolutely NOT, as a fat man, supposed to be going.

I hit the ground hard, right on to the grate. I start to get up and it hits.

My fucking KNEE. I can't put weight on it, so I fall back down into the mud and try the other side.

When I manage to stand, my fucking BACK hurts so much I can't stand straight.

I limp around for a minute trying to assess the damage and if I could still get to work, but nah, ain't no way in hell I was going to be able to get there in my state much less work the entire day.

Thankfully my boss is a good dude. I never miss work, I'm always early and I always cover or pick up an extra shift when he asks. He heard how much pain I was in when I called him and offered to give me a ride home even though I was around the corner from my house.

After a few minutes of limping home, I approach my property. It's at this time I notice an SUV slowly trailing close behind me.

He follows me on to my property, past the driveway all the way TO my house, stops me and proceeds to interrogate me about what I was doing by his warehouse.

Like dog, I get it. I got a little close to your place. I was in a fuckton of pain with the fear of missing work causing massive anxiety, so I wasn't really aware of my exact location.

But do you really think the fat guy in his work uniform, covered in mud, hobbling on 1 leg, bleeding from my left hand while the right is in the crook of my back, bent over like quasi-fucking-modo is trying to break into your place?

Now I'm sure how much work I'm going to miss while I have $8 in my bank account.

Ah well, could be worse.

TL;DR: I wasn't paying attention, slipped in mud, fell onto a storm drain grate and now I'm too hurt to work for a few days.

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