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TIFU rejected a girl because she got her periods

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TIFU

9th grade, friend group of 4. me, my friend, and a pair of twins. we never really studied, just bullshitted in class all day and somehow became really tight because of it. used to sit in pairs too, me and my friend on one bench, the twins either right in front or behind us.

both twins confessed to both of us on the same day btw.

anyway. lunch break. my friend and the other twin had gone off somewhere, so it was just me and her alone in the classroom. totally normal conversation and then out of nowhere she goes "(my name) i like u a lot like a lot lot"

i went blank. completely blank. i had never seen her that way and my brain just didn't know what to do with that information. so i got up and walked out. didn't say anything. she was telling me to wait but i didn't.

and the thing is, when i got outside, i wasn't even thinking about her or how badly i'd just handled that. my brain randomly jumped to this thing that happened a few years before that.

It was my uncle's place. his daughter, maybe 14-15, absolute menace of a human being, called me to her room to "show me something" and pulled out a used period pad and brought it close to my face. like actually close. and me being me i sniffed it.

i can still smell it if i think about it too long. you know what i mean.

and standing outside that classroom, for some reason THAT is what my brain connected to. and i think somewhere in there i just associated the two. like my brain decided periods = disgusting and that's why i should reject her.

which is insane because she was kinda cute, chubby cute. we had real chemistry. she was my friend. there was no actual reason.

but i never told her any of this. never explained, never apologized, just acted like it didn't happen. we barely even spoke after that.

it's been 4 years. no one's confessed to me since. i liked someone last year, finally told her, she liked me back but was already with someone else.

i rejected a girl because she gets her periods. i'm a dumbass.

TLDR: walked out on a girl who confessed to me because my brain associated women with a traumatic period pad sniffing incident from my cousin, fumbled the only other shot i got too, haven't had a confession since.

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