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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by going to Victoria's Secret with an upset stomach

Slightly disgusting story, this actually happened about a year and a half ago. My (now ex) boyfriend had come into town to visit me and wanted to take me to Victoria's Secret and I'm like hell yeah man lets go, so we hop in the truck and head out. I'm walking around looking at stuff but I'm just not feeling it, I'm letting out horrible gas every 10 minutes. There was an employee that kept following me around, twice she asked me if I needed help to which I declined. I was doing my best to keep my distance but the third time she bugs me right as I'm letting out the most noxious fart cloud, so I once again decline and quickly walk away.. and then SHE WALKS DIRECTLY INTO THE FART CLOUD. I think she got the picture, she did not come back to bother me a fourth time.

TL;DR let out a horrible fart, VS employee got caught in the crossfire

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