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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU: By thinking my weed dealers iguana was fake

So I live in a landlocked state where weed is still illegal, so we have to go really far to get legal stuff. So today I'm in need and I message my guy who lives a few blocks away. Everythings normal and I get in my car to go to his place.(I've probably been there about 10 times.) Obviously it's December so everything looks a little different on account of the snow. So I pull in and let him know im there but something in my gut says its the wrong house, he texts back and says, "come in but don't knock my dogs will freak". So now im pretty shook up because I don't think I'm at the right place and I can't knock right? So I walk up to the door and open it to see a man in his 70s standing in his boxers making a sandwich in the kitchen. Whoops so I apologize explicitly and to my surprise he smiles and says "your here for (guy) aren't you?" So im shaken at this point and I say yes with hesitation right as my guy comes out of the bathroom. Thank God right so now everything is going much better and we are chillin for about 20 minutes, at this point I see a really cool statue thing chillin on the table so I lean down to take a better look. Immediately guy says, "hey man carefully that things an asshole" and right as he says that i turn my head to look back at the iguana and its full on charging me! My chin is maybe 3 inches off the level of the coffee table and it met my chin with 4 or 5 quick scratches hahah my bad I guess!

Tl:DR, today I thought my friend got an iguana statue but it was a real iguana and it scratched me pretty good!

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