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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU and launched orange juice into my eyes

I was making screwdrivers so I got the orange juice (a full gallon) and the vodka out of the fridge. I instinctively shook the orange juice bottle and took the cap off. As soon as the cap screwed off, my cat knocked something over in the other room and I placed the cap back on the juice and ran out of the room.

A few minutes later I return to the kitchen to continue making screwdrivers. At this point I had completely forgotten that I had already shaken it and unscrewed the cap so I grabbed it and shook it again. The cap fell off as I grabbed it but before I realized what was happening I swung the bottle up towards my face to shake it, and proceeded to absolutely drench my face in orange juice. the bottle opening is pretty wide so at least like 1/3 of the juice had sprayed me in the face.

So there I stood. 2 AM, already drunk, absolutely soaking wet and unable to open my eyes. My mind had not registered fully what happened so I was probably more confused in that moment than I had ever been in my life. When I smelled the oranges it clicked in my mind like "oh shit, I'm covered in fucking orange juice"

45 minutes of cleanup ensued and I had to take a shower.

TLDR: forgot the orange juice was unscrewed and shook forcefully with the bottle opening towards my face

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