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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by making a dad joke about my fiancee's weight

Prefacing this by saying that I am madly in love with this woman, she is gorgeous, and I have no negative feedback to give about her looks (and, if I ever did one day, I wouldn't be an ass when bringing it up). With that out of the way...

Both my fiancee and I are physically active and in good shape, but we have been trying to make some modest improvements over the last few months. This morning she weighed herself, and expressed disappointment that her weight had gone up slightly from last week.

"What are you at?" I asked.

"144" she replies.

Without any thought, I blurt out "Gross!" Because 144 (or a dozen dozens) is also known as a "gross". You all knew that right?

Right?

My beautiful, loving, wonderful fiancee did NOT know this. Cue a surprised and hurt look from her, and immediate backpedalling and frantic google searching from me to explain my bad joke.

Thankfully, I was able to make my case that I was just an idiot and no other meaning should be taken from my comment. And yes, even if she did know what a gross is it was a jerk thing to say. My pun quickdraw reflexes did a complete end run around my common sense.

TL:DR My fiancee said she weighed 144 lbs, I said "gross" to make a pun. She didn't know "144 things = 1 gross" and thought I was just being really mean.

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