Skip to main content

TIFU when I pulled a deaf woman over for speeding and asked to see her Vagina

Well for starters this was several years ago when I was a young police officer in a college town in the South. I am retired now. To set this up our department had been teaching us American Sign Language to help officers serve the public. I was all about learning sign language and picked some up pretty quickly, or so I thought. Well one night in the summer I am on traffic enforcement looking for drunk drivers and about 1am I stop a car for speeding. As approach the car a young and very pretty co-ed was driving. I start talking to her but she indicates that she is Deaf. Now I still had the ASL for police officers class from a week ago fresh in my mind and I think to myself “great I get to use a new talent in the field”. I indicate that I can sign and she smiles, so far so good! Now I need to add that I was nervous since this was the first time I had used this on the street and she was very pretty. I then sign that I needed to see her drivers license. A look of terror crossed her face and my cop radar went off. I was thinking what have I stumbled upon. I had dealt with people that didn’t have a license, were dangerous, were drunk, or had warrants. I again sign that I am a police officer and I needed to see her drivers license now and put my cop face on. I also remembered that to a deaf person the look on your face is equivalent to your tone of voice and apparently I was near screaming with my look. Now to add to this it is 1am, it is very dark on a side street and I am 6’2 230 lbs. and she is about 5’2 and maybe 100lbs. This poor girl was FREAKED OUT! I finally realize I haven’t stopped a serial killer and simply ask “well why?” To which she looks down at her crotch and shakes her head violently NO. Well my little pea brain begins to gather information in and I realize that I had been lazy in signing the sign for drivers license and instead had been signing “ I am a police officer, show me your vagina!” I still cringe at that and I must have lit up the road with the 1.1 gigawatts red face and the look of embarrassment/horror caught her off guard (well she was on guard 100% at that point) and she realized that I wasn’t a rouge police officer using my authority to sexually assault her on a dark street, but just a cop that sucked at ASL. Well she started laughing at me and it had to be the relief she felt mixed the humor of what I did. It took several minutes to compose herself and I just stood there and took it looking as sheepish as I ever have. I earned every second of her laughing. I just kept apologizing over and over (I’m glad I got that one right at least) Needless to say she DID NOT get a ticket but a story about this well meaning but dumb police officer that severely messed up a traffic stop. TL/DR: I pulled over a pretty deaf woman, asked in ASL to see her drivers license but mistakenly signed vagina instead of drivers license. Hilarity ensues.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU by forgetting my purse and attempting to get fuel

Not the craziest story but hey. I'm obligated to say this was a few months ago but I cringe every time I go past the petrol station . My petrol was getting low, not dangerously so but it said 27 miles left, (oftentimes it then suddenly drops to about 16 for example, and then 5 and then 0 very fast) I didnt have my purse on me as I just didn't need it... Picked my daughter up from school and then went on to collect my 2 stepdaughters from across town and then set off for home. En route the gauge went to 7 and then suddenly it was 1 so I stopped at the petrol station near our house. The petrol was on 0 as i pulled up to the pump and that's when I realised I had no money. I left the kids in the car at the pump and went in to talk to the cashier, it wasn't mega busy but there was a queue, I'd heard that they can help you if you can't pay for fuel. Like keeping something of yours as security. It was an elderly man and he basically refused to help. At this point i...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU - Don’t do what I did

On Sunday morning Aug. 24th, I awoke to discover a large blind spot in my right eye, which turned out to be what is called wet age-related macular degeneration (AMD). It has resulted in a very significant, permanent loss of vision in that eye. Although I maintain good peripheral vision, whatever I focus on at best is very blurry, and mostly disappears. I can barely make out the large E at the top of the eye chart. If this happens to my left eye I’ll be unable to read or drive. It turns out that I missed the opportunity that I had to prevent this from becoming a serious problem because I failed to report what appeared to be minor changes in my vision. In the weeks prior to August I had noticed that what I knew to be straight lines appeared to my right eye to have a little waviness. I also noticed that the color of my front lawn, which I could see through the window from my recliner,  was subdued, looked almost gray, in my right eye. So I scheduled an eye exam, which revealed the p...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by getting suspended for 2 days by my front office in school.

I (13M) am an African American student at Jeannette junior high who had got suspended for 2 days here. I was in math class minding my business until my teacher had told me to go to the main office, which posed no problem to me. As i went down there, the people of the front office had stopped me and made me get a new ID (yes, we have id's.) so i had asked them if i could maybe do a different alternative and call my mother to let her bring the Id here, even then, the Id isn't that important. So, although i was talking to them in a calm manner and not showing any signs of rebellion, they had threatened to call the police on me without thinking twice before calling my parents. This is where i started getting angry, and even then now the black peers agree that could have been a racially motivated action. They then told me to sit in the office conference room because of that, leading into more anger. They had then called my mother who had came over to the school didn't even let ...
Post a Comment
Read more