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TIFU by forgetting women's anatomy and trying to help an elderly lady go to the toilet.

Ofcourse this wasn't today and as if it was a surprise English isn't my first language so please excuse me if I word some things weirdly.

I'm also trying to keep lots of details vague because I obviously want to protect the identity of the woman.

I've made a career change during covid, I started working as a catering worker in a dementia palliative care home. I loved it and I showed interest taking an apprenticeship to become a nurse.

So after a week of observing and seeing my colleagues helping the patients wipe after they went to the toilet we were short staffed and this one woman needed to go.

A bit of detail for people that dont know, dementia isn't just forgetting memories. Patients can become really confused and sometimes they will forget how to put on clothes or go to the toilet. And sometimes will smear stuff around. Which was the case with this person.

Let's call this woman M.

M shows me her classic signs that she needs to go to the toilet and there is no one around. All the nurses were either on break or assisting someone else. So I'm here thinking to myself "how hard can it be?" & "I've seen this particular person go so I know how to do it". I can't let this poor woman not go to the toilet and if I dont assist her I will have to clean the walls myself probably so I say fuck it and get my gloves on.

Mind you I saw a coworker grab a piece of dookie off of her butt, so I assume this happens regularly, this is important. Also a good moment to mention that I learned never to assume anything in my line of work lol.

Once on the toilet everything goes smoothly, up until the intimidating part: wiping. I get the soft warmed up wet wipes and go in. While softly talking to her and keeping her updated on everything I do. After a few wipes they come back pretty clean but I dont want to leave anything behind because this person already has some health problems along with dementia and tbh she cant really use an UTI with it. So I grab another wet wipe and go from front to back again, and I feel a bump so I'm thinking that I hit gold and there is some dookie stuck on her. I try to grab it (lightly) but it wont come off, so I try to rub it off. Also no success, but I really dont want to mess it up and cause her discomfort. So I start vigorously (and ofcourse gently) rubbing to get it off, and suddenly M started to giggle and I look at her face and she's a little red. Then I realized I was rubbing on her clitoris and I was HORRIFIED. I just said sorry and helped her get up and get her pants back up. At this point my mind is racing, do I tell my supervisor? Should I even mention her bowel movement? How do I even phrase it? Why did it feel so foreign and why didn't my stupid mind not think of that?

Luckily after we're done I ask my supervisor to step out and talk to her in private. I told everything and she just started to laugh and told me I made the right decision and she would watch me next time I was helping someone. Ultimately not a huge fuck up but I couldn't look M in the eyes for a long time after, eventhough I know she probably didn't even understand what happend and certainly doesnt remember.

Tl;dr: I was rubbing a womans clit thinking it was poop.

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