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I had an extremely abusive childhood and grew up to resent my parents more heavily my mom. Even though she didn’t abandon me like my dad and wasn’t nearly as abusive as him I’ve always hated her more. We got in an argument a couple of weeks ago about a package and that was the last straw for me I wanted nothing to do with her and left but I couldn’t stay gone and came back for the sake of not being homeless.
Recently my life’s been looking up, I’ve got promoted in the military, have an interview for a manager position tomorrow and if I get it I’d be able to finally fully move out after a couple more months of saving. My full intention is to pack up overnight and leave block my entire family and just live in peace. I was looking at apartments on my phone when my sister noticed and a couple hours later she walks up to me and ask if I’d want to live together. I answered no of course my sister loves my mom and will defend her like it’s her job every time I’ve been stupid enough to trust her she’s told my mom.
Once I told her I was gonna tell the school about my abuse the next day and my mom kept me from school and beat me until I said I wouldn’t. She wasnt home so she couldn’t overhear that.
My mom just didn’t like me happy and making me sad made her happy. My mom being happy makes my sister happy.
I told my sister no I’m not even planning on moving at the moment but she kept insisting. I told her once again no and to leave me alone. She just grimaced and left me alone. I leave my iPad unlocked at home while I work for my baby brother she saw a message between me and a coworker who offered to help me with moving since he has a trailer when I got home confronted me about it.
She of course told my mom what I said who sat down with me and starting ranting about how ungrateful I was and how I’m making her state go back to the way it was when I was a child how she thinks about harming herself because her daughter doesn’t love her. I reminded her that’s she has 11 other kids and that set her off she started straight balling in front of me and I actually felt bad she was literally begging me to forgive her so I told her I did but I would still be leaving and not telling her my address until I’m ready. She then told me how awful that was and how she would worry everyday about me and how it would ruin her health (she’s in her late 30’s). I simply told her she was and has ruined mine and left her alone.
She’s locked herself in her room since then and all my siblings are giving me the cold shoulder “for making her cry on purpose” the whole thing is eating at me and even my friend who I thought would be on my side told me I was wrong and that I should at least keep in contact with her.
TL;DR Today I let my sister find out about my plan to move out and cut contact causing my mom to have a mental breakdown.
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