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TIFUpate: allowing my coworker to set me up

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TIFU by sleeping with my ex girlfriend's boyfriend

I'll start off by disclosing that 18 is the legal drinking age in my country.

A few months ago I had walked in on my (21f) girlfriend (20f) sleeping with her friend (22m). I had immediately broke it off with her and a week later found out her and the man she cheated on me with started dating. Last week I had got a message from her, apologizing and asking to be friends again. Against my better judgement I agreed and invited her and her boyfriend to a party I was having Wednesday night (yesterday) for a birthday. At the party she got pretty wasted and passed out on my bed around 10pm. That's when her boyfriend started to hit on me and trying to hook up with me, at first I was disgusted and was planning on telling my ex when she was sober enough but then I got the stupidest plan stuck in my drunk brain. What if I hurt her the same way she hurt me? So I decided to flirt back and long-story-short me and her boyfriend ended up sleeping together. When I woke up the reality of what I had done had hit me and I realised I had to follow through with the rest of the plan because there was no point if she didn't find out what happened. I asked her if she wanted to just have a girls day and waited for her boyfriend to leave. I assumed that when I told her she would be mad and try to fight me and I decided I'd just take her punches. That's when I told her. "I slept with your boyfriend last night". I waited for her to yell and scream and hit me, but she never did. She just stood there, staring at me, tears running down her cheeks and the most painful look of betrayal and sadness in her eyes. The emotions I felt from seeing her that way we're 1000 times worse than how I felt seeing her cheat on me. I just wanted to hold her and tell her she was going to be okay, but I couldn't, because I was the reason she was like this. She then just turned around and walked away without saying a word to me. An hour later I learnt that she blocked me on everything. I regret everything. I regret telling her, I regret sleeping with him, I regret rekindling our friendship, I regret catching her sleeping with him. I regret falling in love with her. But most of all I regret ever even just thinking about putting her through that pain. I love her.

TL;DR- TIFU by sleeping with my cheating ex's new boyfriend for revenge, only to realise seeing her upset made me feel even worse than getting cheated on.

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