Skip to main content

TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

Post a Comment

TIFU by showering with my husband at 8 months pregnant

Technically this happened yesterday, so it’s a YIFU.

Anyway, I had worked a long day where I was on my feet for most of it and at nearly 8 months pregnant, this is quite a feat. I was EXHAUSTED by the time I came home, everything was swollen and everything hurt, I’ll spare the graphic details. My husband had been home for a few hours before me, mowed the lawn and was ready for a shower by the time I arrived. I wanted to jump in with him, do a quick body and face wash and hop out. The thought of taking a separate full shower made me want to fall asleep right then and there.

So, I get in the shower, wet my face, start massaging in my face wash. As I am hogging all the water, I stand to the inside wall of the shower so my husband can come around and get some water as well. With my protruding belly, I can only get so close to the shower wall. In an attempt to go around my large pregnant ass, my husband loses his balance and in his words starts the “rolling down the windows” arm motions. He said he knew he had to grab on to something, but knew he couldn’t grab me (as he didn’t want me to go down with him) so he decides to go for the shower curtain rod. Which promptly ripped off the wall as he was going straight down to the floor. As I am still facing away washing my face good and well, I hear a loud crash from behind me. Where I turn to see my fully naked husband laying on the floor still holding the shower curtain rod with the shower curtain pooled around him, looking like a very hairy 220lb turtle on its back. After he lets out an meek “ouch” and starts laughing, I lost my shit. I laughed for a solid hour straight at least. Any time I stopped I’d get a flash back image of him splayed out on his back and lose it all over again. Every time I got up to pee during the night (which was a lot) and saw our sad shower curtain hanging from two hooks on the wall now, the giggles would kick back in. And still today, any time we mention it I can’t help but cry laughing.

Today he is sore, but otherwise unharmed. I love my husband but I think we’ve (or I’ve) outgrown our joint shower days for a little while longer.

TL;DR I accidentally knocked my husband out of the shower because i take up too much room with my large pregnant belly.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU by walking into a glass door.

This just happened barely 30 minutes ago. Ended up with a nose bleed and some of the worst nose pain in my life. I can’t even wear glasses without the pressure hurting my nose. So, how did I make the same fuck up a bird would? I put on my sunglasses to leave an appointment and ended up walking nose first into a glass door. Shambling back in shock, I had no damn clue what I had just done. It shocked me so bad that I didn’t comprehend it until I felt liquid drip down my nose. I had turned into the world’s bloodiest leaking faucet. Someone witnessed this in their periphery and asked me if they needed to phone someone. In a panic I basically wailed for them not to, even though I would soon freak out and think I need an ambulance. Someone else came by and ended up giving me paper towels, which quickly looked like I had murdered a mouse with them. My nosebleed soon stopped but not before someone else checked on me. TLDR; fought a glass door and lost. I do not envy the janitorial staff. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by asking my boss why his cock got hard on my leg.

***not a fake post. I’m F 32, He was standing over one of my legs while I was sitting in front of him facing him (spinal adjustment) and he spread my knees with his leg, put his hand on my stomach and then there was a ton of sexual tension and I felt his cock grow into my leg and then start to fill with blood and then twitch on my leg. My boss has been leading me on for two years in subtle ways. Lots of waist pinching, close moments, and “were you good while I was away(s)?” Mostly breadcrumbing himself out to me while his wife (who I also work with) became increasingly hostile towards me. He is someone who has been a mentor to me for ten years. The two of them seem to be having marital problems on and off. The other month, while in close proximity, he started to get hard on my leg and moved when he noticed. A while later, I asked for an open conversation on the attraction between us and what to do about it. It has been distressing me and I had reached my limit. I figured since we’ve...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by going through my girlfriend’s old photos

My girlfriend and I have been together for 9 months or so and things have been up and down but I love her a lot and she loves me a lot. We’re both 20 and she’s had a lot more experience sexually than I have and this has always bothered me but besides that we have a pretty good relationship. We’ve talked about our pasts and she’s had some pretty bad experiences that caused her to kind of go off the rails up until we met. She’s all in on me and I’m all in on her and she’s expressed a lot of regret about her past choices and I’ve tried to be as understanding as possible but I’ve always had some insecurity regarding it. Well anyways last night I was on her laptop and saw her photos were linked to it and I stupidly clicked on it and started going through them. Don’t need anyone telling me that it was dumb and an invasion of privacy because I really realize that now and I will never be going through any of her stuff again. Anyways I ended up seeing a lot of shit. Clicked on a folder that...
Post a Comment
Read more