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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by eating multiple yellow dragon fruits on a day that guests were coming over

There was this new fruit store that opened near my house. I found myself inside of it and the people inside convinced me to buy some yellow dragon fruits. They said if someone doesn’t buy these today we’re going to throw them away because they’re going to be over-ripe. So I decided to be adventurous and buy them. Little did I know what would happen next. I get home and forget about them for a bit. It’s about 3:00 pm now, however I want some food I make dinner and decided to try the dragon fruit for dessert. I cut one open get a spoon “delicious, amazing” I think to myself. I watch some videos whilst eating, and within 10-20 mins both dragon fruits are gone. I don’t even remember eating the second one. However, my stomach does.

Within the next hour, I am on the toilet and can’t get off my stomach is churning and I feel nothing and everything at the same time. It sounds like running water. I have no idea how long I was on the toilet but it was 3 am before I knew it. I try to fall asleep on the toilet but can’t, I can’t I’m in so much pain I can’t even feel my legs at this point because of how little circulation has been in my legs. I try to get up and take medicine for “hardening it” but the minute I stand up a mudslide happens. I don’t know what to do I can’t clean it up. I am toilet-bound. I am in hell.

Now, the gates to hell eventually close, but now I have a different problem. I have guests coming over and there’s mud stains all over my house from me running all over my house trying to find medicine. I have to get the barely working stain-cleaner out and that thing does nothing. I use some sort of dog accident cleaner. Nothing works. I have no clue what to do, I call my mom luckily she comes over and cleans the mess. The mess is still able to be seen but it just looks like chocolate pudding. Let’s just say I kept the guests out of half of the house.

TL;DR, I ate 2 yellow dragon fruit made a mud storm and couldn’t clean it up and had to call my mom because guests were coming over.

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