TIFU by using a nail file as a vibrator

Edit: A lot of people think this story is fake, which is fine, it is pretty unbelievable. However a certain comment piqued my curiosity and led me to further research when I came upon the realization that I have never actually seen my clitoris. So I must correct myself, I didn't file down my clitoris, thankfully. Apparently, It was the clitoral hood. Either way I believe I need to schedule a gynecologist appointment asap.

You're probably wondering "How desperate can someone be?" Well my friend, I am thinking the same thing as I sit here squeezing my legs as tight as possible as an attempt to ease the pain.

Let me begin this tale from the very beginning. I recently have become obsessed with the health of my nails, which has resulted in me purchasing nail hardeners, oils, etc. I take great pride in having nails that can grow long very very quickly, however, as someone who is malnutrition they rarely last before they start breaking and splitting. I needed something else, something to keep my nails nice and round.

I started researching and I thought it would be a good idea to invest in a nail file. I traveled my way to a local store, bought one and brought it home.

Full of excitement over my new file I used it right away. However I noticed something, something that would result in my downfall.

It had a strong vibration.

At the time the thought to use it as a forbidden toy crossed my mind, however it quickly dissipated when I used 100% of my brain power and decided that it was an absolutely idiotic idea.

A few weeks passed without any issues. I continued to use the nail file as intended and thought never once crossed my mind again....

Until today.

Well I guess it's important to mention that I've been basically attempting No Nut November but in December, simply because I totally failed NNN and that simply didn't sit right with me.

And needless to say I was doing quite well until lady red decided to show up and make my hormones go wild. So as I sat in my bed this afternoon, losing the battle against myself, I thought the least I could do if I was gonna fail is make it worth it.

Here I was, attempting to think of the most creative ways to get my rocks off in the best way possible. And there it was, laying on my night stand, calling my name. The nail file.

Without thinking and let me tell you I did not think at all, I immediately grabbed it and shoved it on my lady parts. But I was met with great disappointment, the vibration in the handle wasn't as strong as I thought, in fact I didn't feel anything at all.

Baffled by this fact I took a quick second to inspect the device. Oh yes, it was blatantly obvious now, the vibration wasn't coming from the handle, it was coming from the filing tip!

Once again without thinking I shoved it back where the sun don't shine and heavenly bliss followed. It only lasted a second but is that really a surprise?

It was done, I was satisfied. Now I could move on.

What a fool I was.

I lifted up the file only to realize it was completely covered in blood, and the pleasure I once felt now started to faded into a terrible burn.

I had been filing away my clitoris.

So kids, if there is one big lesson to learn here, Do Not and I mean Do Not use a nail file as a vibrator.

Good day.

P.S. And yes my file tip is now permanently stained red, I have tossed it away into a pit of shame in hopes that none of my household members will see it and question why it looks like I used it to commit a murder. Edit: oh and just to clarify, it wasn't period blood, by this point my cycle had passed, it is exactly what you think it is.

TLDR: out of horniness and desperation I used a nail file as a vibrator and ended up sanding down my clitoris.