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TIFU by eating chocolate covered pretzels

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TIFU by backing my photos, endangering my gf's privacy

TL;DR: Got nudes from gf, couldn't add them to the secret album of my phone so I tried putting them all in a new album, causing to upload all the nudes into google photos, now gf is mad insecure and I'm ashamed of myself.

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Throwaway because I need to get this off.

This happened some hours ago, my gf came over some days ago but we couldn't have sex since she was on her period but she promised to send me nudes. Today I came home from work and was feeling a bit horny so I asked her about it. She sends the nudes, I save them and get off to them. Afterwards, I tried to hide the pictures since my phone had a "private album" option. For some reason, it wasn't giving me the option to save them on that private folder. Here is when the fuck up happens.

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A quick google search told me I hdto synchronize with the cloud to use the private album. Thing is, my phone was a Xiaomi Redmi, which recenctly stopped supporting Xiaomi cloud (which was the ACTUAL cloud I had to be synchronized with). So my stupid ass says "well, let's back everything up" and starts synchronizing with google photos. Thing was, it didn't work, I still couldn't hide her nudes, so I had the brilliant idea of moving them to a new album and hide that album since it was my only alternative. Big mistake. Every single photo taken either by her or me during our long relationships ends backed in google. I said "well shit, just gotta delete them from here". No, you can't. Apparently if you delete them from any backing the photos just stop showing up on your phone gallery. I start panicking because I don't want even the most smallest sliver of a possibility that my gf's privacy is compromised, so I decided to delete everything and move the pictures to my pc in a folder. This might seem like the right move, except this process took more than 2 hours because my horny, stupid, testosterone fueled brain wanted to keep the pictures at all costs on my phone. So the pictures where on google for the whole 2 hours while I was frantically trying to figure out how to save them. I'm not a computer expert but I know perfectly well how any, ANY information on the internet can be recovered, so by keeping the nudes on the cloud for longer I endangered my gf's privacy more and more by the minute.

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Then it comes the worst part.

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I obviously tell my gf how I fucked up because not tellin her would be far worse, we always comunicate with each other and this was something serious and important. For some context, she didn't send nudes ever before our relationship, she even had some nasty experiences with guys taking pictures of her without her consent. She didn't even have penetrative sex, she is a very anxious person who can panic and freak out very easily. So obviously, this fires her alarms and starts feeling very anxious. I try to calm her down tryin to make it more casual, saying things like "don't worry, pretty sure I'm not important enough to get spyed for my pictures lol". I know, like an idiot. Take note this is all by messages, not a call, so everything is slow. I suggest that I completely erase the photos (at this point I already backed them on my pc and deleted everything from google and my phone). She says she's not sure because she knows I really like the pictures. I asked-again, like an idiot-if I could keep some. She said "Ok, let's go to discord and see whic ones we delete".

Then comes the most shameful and anguishing half hour of my life. We go through the photos (which again, are very explicit) of her and I select the ones I want to keep. I want you to take a minute and put yourself both on my shoes and my gf's. We are SELECTING nudes. The source of her anxiety and insecurity caused by my own mistake. I perfectly knew the correct thing to do was to delete them all. but I didn't, I didn't want to let go. Because I'm a horny asshole. Halfway during the process she starts crying. I'm mute, what could I say? I'm sorry? It was like she was a pice of meat and I was selecting the finest cuts. It was gross, awkward, shameful, and I still coulnd't make myself just delete them all. By the end I'm crying too, so she just says "goodnight, I love you". I try to quiet my sobs as she asks if I'm still there. I was devastated, I feel like I completely ruined our relationship -at least in a sexual way-. All the progress we did for her to open up and try new things to the trash can. She feels unsafe, exposed and used all thanks to me. I initially wanted to post this on r/AITA but I answered the question the moment after the idea came.

Insult me, give me advice, I don't care. I probably won't read anything, and won't reply either. Goodnight.

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