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TIFU by punching a "snake" at Niagra falls

This happened when I was about 13. While I was in middle school my granny took myself and a friend to see Niagra falls, my first and (so far) only time being there. I wanted to be prepared for this adventure, so I brought a long all my trusty adventure gear - sunglasses, cargo shorts with the XL pockets, hiking shoes, mosquito proof shirt, and of course my full-brimmed camo hat with chin strap.

For one of the afternoons she booked us a boat tour of the lower falls. I donned my gear and boarded a very full boat complete with a quirky and knowledgeable tour guide. Being my enthusiastic self, I found a seat towards the front and sat next to my friend. The guide pointed out many of the natural and historical landmarks on the tour. While my head was on a swivel, I realized that the chin strap would swing and hit my face in an annoying way, so I lifted it above the front of the brim and folded it up so that it would stay out of my way.

The climax of the tour involved taking the boat close enough to the main waterfall so that you could actually feel the spray. As we approached, the guide was highlighting the wildlife that make there homes in the cliffs by the falls. Apparently, snakes are one such animal, and according to the guide they are quite prevalent in that area. In fact, he said it's not wholly uncommon for them to drop from the rocks onto a passing boat. While I don't have a snake phobia, I'm not exactly a fan of them, and especially not ones that drop onto a boat I'm on. He was just launching into one particular story about a large black snake that had dropped right in front of a woman on a tour boat like ours when my chin strap decided it was a good time to unfurl from the top of my hat and slowly dangle down right in front of my face.

Given the circumstances, my brain was convinced the aforementioned large black Niagra rock-dwelling snake had decided to join our tour and was dangling inches from my nose. My animal brain reacted in milliseconds, with a single thought: punch it. Hard. Why I decided the best option was to punch a snake directly towards my own face I'll never know...but that's exactly what I did. Hard. So hard that the head jolt my fist caused when slamming into my nose knocked my hat clear off and sent a good portion of my upper body into the patron behind me.

As I started to come to my senses and realize what actually happened, I felt the warm trickle of blood creep out of my nose and drop onto my cargo shorts. I looked over at my friend and the tour guide, who were both staring at me in complete shock. After my extremely embarrassed 13 year old self was able to stop the bleeding, disembark and calm down a little, I was able to share a laugh with my friend. Hearing it from his perspective was the best part - I was just sitting there enjoying the tour one moment and then out of nowhere I'm punching myself in the face really effing hard. Like, he could hear the impact. After we finally got back to the room I realized I'd left my hat on the boat, and we both decided it was probably for the best.

TLDR: During a tour of Niagra falls while the guide was talking about snakes dropping from the cliffs the chin strap I'd stowed above above my full-brimmed hat dropped down in front of me and I punched myself in the face really hard.

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