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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by going out for a late night glizzy and woke up to my car missing

Happened last night, I had a craving for my fave food and decided to sneak out for a quick one.

My wife and kids were KTFO and I thought I could go to a local late night spot and get back before any of them noticed.

On my way home, my wife sends me a text reading “Eric woke up and he’s asking for you. Where are you?” FUCK.

So I rush home. Park the car in the driveway, get out, run inside (WE HAVE A SMART LOCK SO NO NEED FOR A KEY) and snuggle my son so he falls back to bed. I pass out with him.

Woke up this morning, got dressed and went to grab my keys from the hook…no keys. Searched the house, no keys. Opened the front door because I thought “hope I didn’t leave them in the car…” mouth dropped to the floor as I just stared at an empty driveway.

I’d left my keys in the car.

Thanks to my particular auto insurance, there is a gps tracker in my car and I was able to pinpoint where it was. 3 cities away…and 2 not so reassuring engine diagnostic alerts triggered.

The police were able to locate it and confirm it was where I thought it was. They waited for me to get there and they checked for fingerprints but likely didn’t find any (still waiting on the report).

Thankfully we did not have much of value in our car and they left all of our kids car seats and stroller! They did take some car phone chargers, catalytic converter AND left the car smelling like an ashtray.

TL;DR: Ended up purchasing a $2000 (prob minimum what a catalytic converter for my car costs) hot dog last night, cuz I left my car keys in my car overnight and someone stole it and jacked the catalytic converter.

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