TIFU by going on dates with friends while being in a relationship

This is definitely a combination of tifu and aita

I recently finished college and am moving to a new city, let’s call it the Big Pear. I had a friend group of about 25 girls and guys in college, some of which were also moving to the Big Pear post graduation. I also have a gf outside of the group; we’ll be in a long distance relationship for the next few months.

Out of the group, I was moving in second. While planning the move, I told my gf that I would be asking my friend Ally for help. For context, Ally used to date one of my closest friends. She was also roommates with my ex for most of college. Differences aside, all of us were friends in and out of the friend group.

I asked Ally for help moving in. In return, dinner would be on me. I got the idea from the internet, and asked my gf if it sounded reasonable. I asked her not because I was seeking permission, but instead to ask if covering dinner for helping move in made sense.Begin the tifu. Ally helps me move in. During the move both of us ask each other where we would like to eat, with both of us drawing blanks. We finally finish the move, and I realize there’s this vegan pasta place she spoke highly about last year that sounded great. She doesn’t seem to remember it well, but we end up at the restaurant with the help of google.

Now, this restaurant is super romantic. Think dimly lit, Italian music, etc. I got the vibes of the restaurant right away but it was too late — I really wanted to try this vegan pasta. The food was great, I drop her off at her apartment, and I go home to tell my gf of my move in.

She’s all happy and all until I tell her the name of the place we ate ate. She gets all sad, apparently it’s a place she wanted to take me for when she visits me in the Big Pear. She also knew the vibe of the place and joked that I took Ally on a date.

Now if I told you this was all, it continues. The next week, Jane moves into the Big Apple. Jane is currently dating one of my friends from freshman year of college. Us two decide on getting a snack before exploring the city. Google suggests a vegan cafe. Me — being vegetarian and not eating eggs— am elated at the fact that I can try vegan pastries. It’s not something I get to have often. We get there and it’s an asian, candle lit restaurant. In too deep, we decide to enjoy the amazing vegan sushi. The candle on the table even went out once, and was relit by one of the waiters.

I told my gf this and yet again I feel bad. We are both long distance for the time being. I told her I would looove to take her to this restaurant soon. If I told you this happened only twice, I would be lying.

One of my friend’s gf was at the Big Pear interning for the summer. I moved in before her internship ended. She had heard of this bagel place on TikTok and hadn’t tried it yet. She takes me and we enjoy some (normal) bagels in a park. The day ends with biking around the city and meeting some of her friends.

Fast forward to that night when I told my gf about the bagels we had. Call it deja-vu but this bagel place was yet another place she wanted to visit. Apparently TikTok had made that place super popular (even though the bagels were mid).

My gf has visited me a few times and I finally took her to the vegan cafe (it was my favorite) but she still makes offhand comments about all the dates I go on in the Big Pear without her. I feel like an asshole (hence the aita) but also realize this was all a unfortunate sequence of events.

TL;DR: accidentally went on numerous “dates” with friends after moving into a new city because I could not guess the vibes of the restaurant. My long distance girlfriend is upset I've done things she wanted to do together for when she would visit me