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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by discussing Bigfoot at work

Obligatory this didn't happen today, but yesterday.

Anyway, I work in a grocery store, but I usually stay in the backrooms all day. It can be miserable, so sometimes coworkers and I will come up with topics to talk and debate on. For some reason this time around it was Bigfoot, and then it spiraled into more silly conspiracy theories, and I jokingly went, "Yeah, and the earth is TOTALLY flat!" (I promise, this joke is relevant.) My buddy and I then went around the department asking what people thought of Bigfoot, and one guy thought it'd be funny to ask our resident crazy old lady, "Hey, you think Bigfoot is real? And what about the earth, what shape is it?"

All hell broke loose. We thought she was joking. It started with a firm, "The earth is flat." We laughed at her, saying, "No, c'mon, seriously? It's obviously a cone." And stupid stuff like that. "No, I'm serious. NASA is a fraud, and the earth is flat. Nothing supports it being a sphere. OP, c'mon, you know better, right?" It was then that I regretted befriending the crazy lady. I had to turn away from her and bite my thumb to conceal my laughter, and eventually said, "Yeah, sure." She then ranted about big pharma and the food coloration is what gives kids neurodivergency, and I kid you not, ANOTHER coworker went, "She's so right. The earth is flat and big pharma is a scam."

TL;DR joking about Bigfoot unveiled two flat-earthers (that I know of) in my department that are so ready to die on that hill.

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