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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

TIFU by crushing my boyfriend's balls in my sleep

Posting on mobile so I'm sorry for any formatting issues. Posting on a throw away

TIFU by crushing my boyfriend's balls in my sleep,

My boyfriend and I were in bed on a nice relaxing Sunday morning, neither of us had work or tasks that needed to be done today. So we were taking it easy, having a little bit of a sleep in.

My boyfriend always wakes up earlier than me, and usually spends that time cuddling me, while scratching my head and browsing Reddit on his phone.

I was half asleep, and thought this would be the perfect time to massage his balls and have some lazy Sunday morning sex together. But I didn't realize how tired I still was, and I fell asleep while cradling his balls.

So there I am, asleep and suddenly for the first time in my life I get jolted awake from feeling like I'm falling, I've never had this feeling before, so it was quite frightening. I was panicking. At the same time my boyfriend was making panicking noises, not the type of noises you would expect from someone comforting you.

It turns out that when I woke up thinking I was falling, I proceeded to use all my strength that I didn't even know I had and squeezed his balls, I grabbed onto his balls because I thought I was falling and grabbing something to stop the falling. Unfortunately, this was his balls.

He's screaming I'm screaming We're both screaming The cat, not screaming for once.

I began comforting him and he told me what happened from his perspective, I'd started massaging his balls, fell asleep and I was asleep for a good 20 minutes. I was snoring, not heavily but little cute snores. Then all of a sudden I'm making groaning noises, groaning and moaning like I'm scared of something, I'm uncomfortable, I'm doing this for about 5 minutes before I start panicking and squeeze his balls with the strength of 10,000 people.

You're probably thinking to yourself, op, why didn't your boyfriend move your hands off his balls when you were asleep? Because this is never happened before and he thought he was safe from a death grip.

I proceed to spend the rest of the morning comforting him.

To add, about a month ago I was spooning him, It was a Sunday morning again, and I was half asleep. He wanted me to put my leg over him, I lifted my leg and heel kicked his balls unintentionally. I think the lesson we can both learn from this is I'm more dangerous when I'm half asleep than when I'm awake, especially to his balls.

Boyfriend is okay, just a little wounded.

TLDR: fell asleep cradling my boyfriend's balls, thought I was falling in my sleep and grabbed his balls for dear life & accidentally crushing them.

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