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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU: By Pavloving myself into getting an erection every time I hear the “Octonauts” theme song

This TIFU has slowly happened over time, but it’s today that it all culminated into a terrible realization.

My kids don’t watch TV that often. But when they do, they usually choose to watch “Octonauts,” a show about anthropomorphized animals saving ocean life. They love it and it’s guaranteed to bring about 22 minutes of uninterrupted time for me to accomplish whatever I need.

A couple of months ago, I proposed to my wife a quickie while Octonauts was on. 22 minutes was more than we needed (whomp). But anyway, it worked as planned; we had fun with no interruptions.

We’ve done this several more times since then. Octonauts goes on, clothes come off. I’m always the one that puts it on for the kids though, and I didn’t realize that I was slowly conditioning myself to expect getting laid as soon as I heard the opening theme song of the show.

As chance would have it, we had only put on Octonauts for quickies since that first time. In other words, I never put it on just to do some chores around the house or whatever. Just for sex.

So, today, my wife is out of town and I need to clean the kitchen. Usually the kids play fine on their own but they were being rowdy today so I decided to be kind to myself and put on an Octonauts to keep them occupied so that I could clean.

As soon as the theme song started playing I started to get an erection. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. Random boners happen, of course, but I couldn’t help but notice the instantaneous timing of it. Then it hit me.

So, now, I can’t put Octonauts on for the kids just to catch a break anymore. It’s too weird.

Good news, though. I guess if I ever need help getting in the mood, my wife and I can just watch Octonauts while we bang it out.

TL;DR: I slowly conditioned myself to associate sex with a children’s TV show.

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