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TIFU by popping a balloon and getting a black eye

There was a party at my place and everyone had gone home. My roommates were out till the evening and I was left bored and a little drunk. I started tidying up a bit but wasn't really feeling it. There was a few balloons on the floor and I stepped on one out of boredom. To my surprise, my foot sank into it and it didn't pop. Took both feet to do it. Then I had a drunken thought pop into my head. I wondered just how big these balloons could get if I kept blowing air into them. So I grabbed one, sat down and started trying to untie the knot. It was hard to do, especially as I'd been drinking, but I was determined and had nothing better to do. Eventually, I got the bloody thing untied and brought it to my lips. I started blowing it bigger, not really paying much thought to what I was doing. My partner hadn't blown them very big and it took a few breaths to make it feel really full. Then I carried on going out of curiosity, not really knowing what to expect. The bit you use to tie it started filling up and soon there was nothing left to hold on to. It was a bit of a struggle to keep it in my lips but I kept on going, surprised it hadn't popped. After a lot of puffing, and the balloon getting to quite a large size, I regretted my decision.

There was a bang like a gunshot and suddenly my eye was stinging like someone had hit me. It teared up and I thought for one drunken moment that I was going to go blind. After inspecting it in the mirror, it was swollen and there was a bit of a cut above my eye. I grabbed a bag of peas and sat down holding it against my throbing eye, thinking how stupid I was.

Then to make things worse, my partner came home. She thought I had gotten into a fight and started panicking. I explained what happened, then she hit my arm and called me a moron. She then told me there were bits of balloon all over the living room. It was like confetti. After telling me off, she had a look at my eye and said I got lucky it didn't do more damage.

So yeah, think things through before you act on random drunken thoughts. I almost lost an eye 😆

TL;DR I blew a balloon until it burst and it hit me in the eye, causing a bruise.

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