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TIFU by saying my girlfriend looked "gross" after she had just showered.

My [28M] girlfriend [26F] had just gotten out of the shower in the morning and was asking me what she should wear. I made a suggestion, but she said she didn't want to wear that because it was too tight. She said she was feeling gross.

She knows I almost always say exactly what I mean, including compliments and criticisms. This is important to me personally as well as in our relationship because she has had body positivity issues, and I love her body and the way she looks.

In my brain, I meant to say, "Well, why do you feel gross? You look cute!" And what came out of my mouth, as sharp, and clear as could possibly be was, "Well, you look gross."

We both freeze, shocked. "She's squeaky clean, totally naked, and I just called her 'gross.' She probably thinks there is no way I didn't mean that. Fuck fuck fuck..." While I'm thinking this with a silent, dumb look on my face, I see her eyes filling up with tears and she grabs a towel to cover herself like she wants to crawl up inside a shell.

I tell her what I meant to say, and that "gross" isn't how I perceive her or have ever perceived her, but she's destroyed, trying to hold herself together as best she can through tears streaming down her cheeks. She believes me, and says she knows I wouldn't lie (about what I meant to say), but it was still a deep cut.

I had to leave to go to work, but I could tell she was still very hurt, just glassy eyed and jaded. On my way, I made some calls and took the day off. I turned around, picked up some flowers, sausage for breakfast, and a cheesecake (our favorite) for later. When I showed back up, she was shocked again, but this time in a good way.

TL;DR I meant to say "Why do you feel gross? You look cute." Instead I said, "You look gross." We're okay now.

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