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TIFU by not giving my mom anything for her birthday

TIFU by not giving my mom anything for her birthday

Sorry that this post is a little long. I beg you to hear me out for a minute. Money wasn’t an issue but knowing what to get her was. I hate to admit it but I know very little about my mother and if I ask any other family member I get shit for not knowing. I spent a good amount of my childhood in my room so I didn’t know much. For the last 2 years, I made her breakfast before she went to work and she LOVED it, the year after it was a combined effort with me and my sister but our mom was out with our stepdad for 2 days but loved it when she got back. This year my sister was off to college and ordered our mom some flowers and chocolates, but for a month I was overthinking.

Thoughts that ran through my mind were, “Should I get her food?” “No, we both lost weight together and it might be insensitive”. “Should I buy her a back or a foot massager?” “No she has back issues and it might hurt her or she won’t use it”. “A rumba?” “Shit, they are expensive and she said she thinks sweeping is better”. I kept contradicting myself until I landed on a movie night, I could pay for any movie she wanted to see and we could watch it at home so she didn’t have to drive anywhere, she was legitimately excited about it, But when I got back from school my little brother (4) broke the TV. I was crushed and realized I had run out of time, I made her a card put a cool coin I found with a bat on it, and gave it to her. I forgot to make her a card earlier and it was rushed, she knew it. She was very disappointed and I was crushed, I’m thinking of going all out at Christmas for her to make it up even though it’s not the same. I’m getting criticism from all sides because I’m not good at gifts, I wanted to give her something she would like and be able to use if possible. I feel like I failed as a son.

Whenever she’s home from being out to sea I’ll try to figure out more about her and my asking to talk more about her seemed to brighten her mood. My Mom asked me if I wanted to fly to South Carolina for Thanksgiving, based on her body language it looked like she wanted to go, I didn’t even fight her on it and said yes even though I hate the state because I keep getting severely sick when I go there if I eat anything. My only condition was getting some type of allergy/nausea medicine.

TLDR: Thought too hard about what to give my Mom on her birthday, took too long, and ended up giving her nothing but a crappy card and a coin so my mom thinks I forgot, how can I do better in the future?

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