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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by showing my boss my entire, bare ass

This afternoon, my coworker was startled by the discovery of a very large, dead bug in a bucket of sanitizer. I actually rather enjoy insects, and while everyone else was revolted, I found the big fellow quite fascinating. I couldn't recall having ever seen this type of bug before, and I took a quick picture before disposing of it so I could identify it using Google Lens (it was a huge fishfly, for anyone curious).

My boss later asked if I'd happened to take a picture. He hadn't gotten a good look at it, himself, and he was curious to see it and get an ID. We don't take too kindly to bugs where I work, and I suspect he was interested in knowing if this large, winged intruder might be the first sign of an impending issue. While he stood looking over my shoulder, I opened my gallery to show him the picture I'd taken.

I'm sure that anyone can take a decent guess as to what sort of thing happened next, based on the title. But we're going to pause and rewind a bit for proper context. You see, this morning, my coworkers had been discussing our previous boss. She was a loud, pushy, and very unprofessional woman (not that I work in a particularly professional environment to begin with). She had a regular habit of slapping our asses, among other rather inappropriate behavior. This was the topic of conversation between my coworkers. One girl asked a more recent hire if she'd ever been shown the infamous photo of a bruise that our old boss had left on my butt cheek after an especially aggressive slap, and she said she hadn't. Of course, I showed her the picture. It's heavily cropped, but still very much a clear picture of my bottom.

Obviously, you know what happened next. I, a young woman, opened my gallery in front of my 65-year-old boss. What came up was not the big, creepy bug picture. Instead, we were both suddenly confronted with an alarmingly clear image of my full, bare ass adorned with a lovely hand-shaped bruise. I immediately blurted out, "I'M SO SORRY, [NAME]!" He went bright red, spun around, and shouted, "NEVER MIND!" And he rushed to the back office. I crumpled to the floor in tears of unstoppable laughter, absolutely mortified. We did not make eye contact for the remaining 30 minutes of my shift. I might need to transfer to a new location.

TL;DR: Tried to show my boss a picture of a bug. Showed him a nude, instead.

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