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(Throaway, I genuinely feel ashamed about this) For some background, I've had a rough year. My depression has been at a all time high since 2021, but I've been battling it for a while. My girlfriend has recently started a new job, and I'm trying to be happy for her. But I genuinely can't help but feel ashamed for missing her as much as I do and my mental health has taken a fucking nose dive since then. She knew it would basically make us have zero time together, which is fine. To explain, with me still being in Highschool and having controlling parents, I can't see her on weekends or out of school at all. So basically all we get is texting and 20 minutes after school. The job she started goes from the evening until about 10 (which I'm sleeping then). As well, our school put in a new phone ban so we can't talk to each other at all during the school day. We also have different 1st periods so we can't see each other then. So we get that 20 minutes and she's off for work. Days she's off, im busy with studying as well. I just feel bad for the way I'm handling this, especially when it was inevitable for that to happen. I just feel utterly worthless for being so dependent to the degree that this is happening when she just gets a job. I tried talking with her before about it but she just told me "I don't know how to help you" and just left it at that, and is (probably) mad at me a bit for feeling like that. Why am I feeling like this? Fuck me man. I really should just kill myself at this point
TL;DR : Girlfriend started a new job, instead of being happy for her my mental health decided to nose dive
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