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TIFU trying to making my daughter laugh but ended up with a swollen face

My wife Marge 29F and I 31M have a 5 month old daughter Maggie (names changed for privacy). I am currently working at a office located only 7 minutes from home, and often come home for lunch so I can spend more time with our daughter.

Yesterday, I was eating my lunch and Marge offers me a jello cup, which gave me a brilliant idea. I asked Marge for a straw, to which my wife rolled her eyes (she knew what was coming) but obliged and grabbed me a straw out of the pantry.

I grab the straw and start sucking Jello out of the cup using the straw as a way to make Maggie laugh. It worked, maybe a little too well, because Maggie was laughing the cutest hysterical baby laugh I had ever heard.

I sucked up one more line of jello out of the cup, and her laugh made me laugh just as I sucked the jello up and the jello went back out the wrong way: my nose.

I immediately knew I fucked up. I felt the globs of jello stuck in my nasal cavity, and it was burning like crazy. I started coughing uncontrollably, and Marge thought I was chocking so she started hitting my back as I trying to fully grasp what happened.

I told her the jello was in my nose, so Marge hands me a tissue and I tried blowing my nose to get the jello out, but the pain was not going away. Then, my sinuses started swelling. The area around my nose swoll up so much I looked like a chipmunk. On top of that, when I speak I sound extremely congested.

This was a major issue because I was set to give a presentation to new clients when come back from my lunch break, and these clients are HUGE for our company.

I called my boss and explained to him what happened, and if he still wanted me to give the presentation. He told me he would get my colleague to take care of it, and that I should probably get that checked out because I sounded like a different person when talking to him.

I stayed home, as I really hate doctors, and took some ibuprofen to try and get the swelling to go down in my face. Unfortunately, it did not.

I got a text later that night from the colleague who had to give the presentation telling me I was an idiot, and the presentation did NOT go as well as they wanted. She said she didn't know as much information regarding this client as I did and made her and our company look bad in front of senior management and our new clients.

This morning I woke up and the swelling has spread across my face and I have a severe headache. Right now, I am begrudgingly sitting in the urgent care lobby waiting for a doctor to see me.

TL;DR Went home on my lunch break, and tried making my daughter laugh by sucking jello up through a straw. Jello went out my nose instead and now my sinuses and face are swollen. I was supposed to give a presentation at work, but, because my face is swollen, got reassigned to a colleague who said it didn't go well and now blames me.

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