Skip to main content

TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

Post a Comment

TIFU by trying to calm my dogs down

This actually happened yesterday morning. I was cleaning my house, tidying up to get some work done when my two dogs decided to summon the hounds of hell. They've done this a few times, but always inside, usually when I'm leaving the house and they want to go with me. Well, not yesterday. Yesterday, they were in my fully fenced backyard and decided to start howling, barking, and generally just doing the dog equivalent of screaming at the top of their lungs. I was really embarrassed and worried someone would call the cops and think my dogs were being abused or something so I ran outside and started begging them to please stop, however, the situation got to me after a minute and I started giggling while hysterically saying "please stop" and "please don't do this". Apparently my near-hysterical voice sounds very much like I'm begging for my life because I managed to get the girls calmed down and in the house and about 30 seconds later my neighbor came charging into the house with a gun and 911 on speed-dial with the intent that he was going to save my life. He made it about 3 steps in the door and saw me alone, eating mints, and just stopped and started looking around. He then confesses to me that he and his wife thought I was being murdered or something because they heard me begging (for my life) while my dogs were making sounds they'd never heard before. I'm so embarrassed I'm afraid to go get my mail incase I bump into them. Thanks girls. Honestly though, it's good to know they have my back incase something ever did happen!

TL;DR my dogs sporadically enjoy "screaming" for no reason and while begging them to stop so my neighbors wouldn't think they were being abused, my neighbors instead thought I was being murdered

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU by walking into a glass door.

This just happened barely 30 minutes ago. Ended up with a nose bleed and some of the worst nose pain in my life. I can’t even wear glasses without the pressure hurting my nose. So, how did I make the same fuck up a bird would? I put on my sunglasses to leave an appointment and ended up walking nose first into a glass door. Shambling back in shock, I had no damn clue what I had just done. It shocked me so bad that I didn’t comprehend it until I felt liquid drip down my nose. I had turned into the world’s bloodiest leaking faucet. Someone witnessed this in their periphery and asked me if they needed to phone someone. In a panic I basically wailed for them not to, even though I would soon freak out and think I need an ambulance. Someone else came by and ended up giving me paper towels, which quickly looked like I had murdered a mouse with them. My nosebleed soon stopped but not before someone else checked on me. TLDR; fought a glass door and lost. I do not envy the janitorial staff. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by asking my boss why his cock got hard on my leg.

***not a fake post. I’m F 32, He was standing over one of my legs while I was sitting in front of him facing him (spinal adjustment) and he spread my knees with his leg, put his hand on my stomach and then there was a ton of sexual tension and I felt his cock grow into my leg and then start to fill with blood and then twitch on my leg. My boss has been leading me on for two years in subtle ways. Lots of waist pinching, close moments, and “were you good while I was away(s)?” Mostly breadcrumbing himself out to me while his wife (who I also work with) became increasingly hostile towards me. He is someone who has been a mentor to me for ten years. The two of them seem to be having marital problems on and off. The other month, while in close proximity, he started to get hard on my leg and moved when he noticed. A while later, I asked for an open conversation on the attraction between us and what to do about it. It has been distressing me and I had reached my limit. I figured since we’ve...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by going through my girlfriend’s old photos

My girlfriend and I have been together for 9 months or so and things have been up and down but I love her a lot and she loves me a lot. We’re both 20 and she’s had a lot more experience sexually than I have and this has always bothered me but besides that we have a pretty good relationship. We’ve talked about our pasts and she’s had some pretty bad experiences that caused her to kind of go off the rails up until we met. She’s all in on me and I’m all in on her and she’s expressed a lot of regret about her past choices and I’ve tried to be as understanding as possible but I’ve always had some insecurity regarding it. Well anyways last night I was on her laptop and saw her photos were linked to it and I stupidly clicked on it and started going through them. Don’t need anyone telling me that it was dumb and an invasion of privacy because I really realize that now and I will never be going through any of her stuff again. Anyways I ended up seeing a lot of shit. Clicked on a folder that...
Post a Comment
Read more