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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by not taking a taxi

This actually happened last Thursday, but it’s an ongoing event, so I think it counts!

This might be a bit rambling, but that’s because I’m trying to focus on something else while my heel hurts like a motherfucker, read on to find out why!

Me and some friends went on a ski trip and had a dope ski in ski out flat up a very slippery hill. On the second night of our trip we decide to go get some pizza in town. It’s a fairly short walk down a very slippery hill, I suggest we take a cheap taxi as it’s very slippery and none of us have grippy shoes. My idea is shot down. Anyway so off we go penguin walking our way down the hill.
When we’ve almost reached the bottom and we’re almost safe on the flat main square I lose my balance but because I have cat like reflexes I manage to get my legs firmly under me before I fa- then I hear it, I think everyone hears it, a very loud SNAP. I fall to the ground and calmly tell the others “I think I broke my foot”, they look at me like I’m an idiot. They then look at my foot pointing the opposite direction from my knee and look back at me and go “oh shit you actually broke your foot”. My brain has now realized how much this fucking hurts. I lie there on my back shouting at them that I need an ambulance between pained breaths. I’m honestly not sure how long it took for the paramedics to arrive, probably like 20 minutes, but it felt like a very long time.

They loaded me up in the ambulance and took me to the ski village clinic who very graciously stayed open for me. They x-rayed my ankle and confirmed that one bone had snapped and the other was very fractured. I was then given ketamine and remember feeling the worst pain of my life for about 3 seconds as they started putting my foot back in place (Idunno what the medical word for this is) and then they were done. I only realized later when talking to my friend who came with me in the ambulance that this procedure took 45 minutes and I blacked out.

Anyway they then took me to a hospital about an hour away and I got to try some more drugs like morphine and others… then because of the silly way my countries healthcare works where the country is split into healthcare regions this hospital isn’t allowed to do surgery (unless absolutely life threateningly necessary) on me without getting the go ahead from my home region. And they can only get that go ahead during regular working hours and it was currently about 10pm. So that night I got to have a nice ketamine and trauma induced panic attack before being given another drug that calmed me right down. The next day (Friday) was quite uneventful, we got the go ahead to do the surgery, but the hospital couldn’t fit me into the surgery schedule, so I just kinda slept in a morphine haze all day.
Saturday morning I’m told my home region wants me to come home so they can do the surgery. So I spend most of Saturday in my morphine haze until I’m loaded into an ambulance and taken to the airport to get loaded into my very own private jet (actually an ambulance airplane, I didn’t even know these existed). The lovely nurse on my private jet gets me not with a glass of champagne, but a cocktail of drugs that puts me right to sleep. Best flight of my life tbh.

I then arrive here, finally home (well kind of, the closest hospital to home). It’s now Saturday evening and because the different regions don’t share journals and information I am back to square one. Instead of being directly taken to orthopedics I get to spend the night in the ER waiting for a doctor to tell me I’ve broken my ankle.

Sunday dawns and I’m going into surgery, only my foot is by now way too swollen for the actual surgery I need so instead I’m getting some stabilizing rods shoved through my heel and into my shin bone (actually this is very cool even though while writing this it is causing me immense pain).

Monday and Tuesday are largely uneventful. I’m just waiting for the swelling to go down in my foot and all of a sudden on Tuesday night (right now) my heel starts hurting a whole lot, so I decided to write to keep my mind off of it. It’s not working… to be continued.

TL;DR I slipped and fell and snapped my ankle and am in a lot of pain

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