Skip to main content

TIFUpate: allowing my coworker to set me up

Post a Comment

TIFU by putting a CBD cream on my penis

Okay so this started three days ago; but the TIFU part was today. I used this Mexican brand CBD (90mg) cream called Mariguanol; and it lists the following ingredients: “Isopropyl alcohol , hidroxido de amonio, carbopol 940, hidroxido de sodio, azul brillante, sulfato de magnesio, L-mentol cristal, sulfato de cobre, 2-isopropyl-5-mentilfenol” The notable ones translate as such: - Isopropyl alcohol - Ammonium hydroxide - Carbopol 940 - Sodium hydroxide - Brilliant blue - Magnesium sulfate - Menthol crystal - Copper sulfate - 2-isopropyl-5-methylphenol

Anyways, my dick burned a shit ton for 5 minutes. 5 minutes later it felt pretty good, it has 90mg of CBD. What does my dumbass do? I put more, but just on the dorsal area (surface of the penis if you look down on it standing up). Burns again; I wash it off after 20 seconds. Didn’t want to risk anything bad.

Too late. For two days I didn’t notice anything wrong with my dick; I hadn’t even applied it beyond those two times; until today I woke up and it has red scarring on top of sorta of dry rough looking skin, even my balls looks extra wrinkly and sort of rough looking (yeah I applied some there too.) I put on some lotion with propylene glycol and then slathered a bunch of aquaphor on top.

Fuck me, wish me luck. I just started dating this new chick too. Fuuuuuuuck

TL;DR: Put some harsh chemicals on my dick thinking it was just some safe CBD cream which ended up giving me some chemical burn marks some days later for some reason.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU almost so bad by not unlogging from this Reddit account

I use this Reddit account to mod r/hearhimfuck , watch my porn and answer NSFWAMA when I feel like it. I religiously log off completely after every time because I don't want my partner or anyone knowing about this account. It's the holidays and we are all busy so I had a quick session with myself and ran to get a shower and leave for another family Christmas dinner. My phone stayed in my purse the whole evening. By the end there's 6 of us left and we're sitting in the living room, having mellow conversation. Pets are discussed and photos shown. Someone asks about my dogs so I go fetch my phone and sit back on the couch. As soon as I unlock it, there's a full blown ANAL clip playing. Fortunately, the sound was off. I manage to turn the sound all the way down and shut the app without anyone seeing. TLDR; Iwas THIS close from having hardcore porn blasting surrounded by my parents, my partner, an aunt and a two cousins. I can't imagine the aftermath of what could...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by fucking my coworker

Happened a couple of days ago, but yeah, as the title says... Oops... We've worked together for about a year now; we've always been friendly, but I never really clocked her as a potential romantic option; she's my coworker, she had a boyfriend when we started working together, and to be honest I just thought she was completely out of my league: I'm a schlub and she is gorgeous So when she texts me asking if we want to hang out after work, I genuinely thought nothing untoward would happen; I thought we were just going to chill and watch cartoons; and for a while we were just having a nice platonic hangout. But we got very drunk, and eventually she was giving me the bedroom eyes and saying we should make out. I very emphatically said that was a bad idea, but she kissed me anyway, and at that point I really lost any semblance of self-restraint.. I am not proud of myself, at all. I can tell myself that she came onto me, but ultimately I also comepletly let it happen. No...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by shopping on Amazon

So I have an Amazon account, and a family. Anyhow, the person I'm seeing likes to do things with me... try new things if you know what I mean 😏 Recently I've ordered a few packages with adult toys, swing, etc. And... clone a willy. It came in yesterday while I was out. While I was out I got a notification that the cloning kit came in. I sent my son a text asking him to bring my Amazon package in. He said he had already. I didn't think much of it. Until last night when I went to go... use it. I asked my son where the package was on my way out the door. He asked "The plant stand or the cloning kit?". Mind you, the boxes DO NOT say what the contents are, nor were they opened. He must have realized what he said because my face is a goddam story book. I just stood there silent and shocked. He pointed towards the closet. This has been going on for ages, but he has NEVER indicated knowing what's in the packages. So now my teenage son knows his mom is a freak. ...
Post a Comment
Read more