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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by thinking I could fix him

I am coming finally to realize the extent of my fuck up today, though the fucking up has taken a long time of fucking up to get here.

Go ahead and shame me, I deserve it. I ignored every red flag and went ahead anyway. I'd be the one who could just love enough, work enough, read enough, commit enough to make it work. I'm such a fool.

He has never been good at communicating. He is angry. He is mean and is verbally abusive. He is viciously defensive. He treats me in the same horrible way he treats his mother. String of failed relationships he refused to talk about. I married him anyway. I have a house and kids with him.

Everytime he got somewhat better and I'd see some improvement it'd convince me that this was workable. Then it'd regress to how it always was. He has straight up admitted all his faults to me and told me he won't change.

Why did I let myself accept this?

Tldr: cliche he won't change and I thought I could be the special princess that would do it.

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