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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by faking an orgasm while losing my virginity and ending up in the Hospital

So this didn’t happen today but my repressed memories came back and I wanted to share this.

So I (at the time 18M) was in my first year at collage. I never had a girlfriend and was not the most experienced with dating so didn’t know how to react some things which is how it got so bad.

I was hanging with one of my friends and she was a great wingwoman at the time. Helped me boost some of my confidence as I was on the heavier side and didn’t try hard with the girls. We were all in a group and this one girl and I started talking we were big into gaming and when my friend over heard she mentioned my PC setup in my room and how awesome it was. The girl I was talking to gushed about it and since it was nearby asked to maybe see it. We were early in the night so there was a lot of time before hitting the bars. We went over and on the way she was holding my arm and rubbing up against me. I was picking up the vibes and could feel the private start standing at attention.

We got to the room and I showed her the setup after not even 2 minutes she started kissing me and we made our way to the bed. I was so excited my virgin ass was so excited and happy I remembered condoms. So we start and I won’t give too many details but it was fun and she clearly had a good time. After about 20 minutes she said “Fuck are you close yet?”. While I was having a good time I was not and instead of saying that I told her I “got off getting her off” and wanted to do more before I did. After another 10 minutes I was getting nervous we need to head back soon so I did the dumb thing and fake an organism. I just held it and made some noises but she bought it.

She was still clinging in my arm and telling me she enjoyed it, all I could think about thou was getting rid of the console so she couldn’t see it was empty. I was able to dispose of it and we left with me still rocking one and so pent up.

On the walk back I could feel pressure down there and it was getting more and more. By the time we got back to the party it turned into pain. I thought a drink or two might help but it did not. The girl was still with me and grinding sometimes which kept making it hard to not seemed I was in pain.After 40 minutes I decided to go to the bathroom and look down there. I notice one of my boys is swollen and I can’t touch it. I panicked and realized I needed to go to the hospital. I came out found my friend and told them the issue, she got worried we got an Uber. I told the girl I’m so sorry but couldn’t go out anymore as I’m going to the hospital. She offered to come but I said not my friend was coming with me as I didn’t want to tell her why.

In the car I told my friend everything and they couldn’t help but laughing thinking I was going to the ER for blue balls. We got there and checked in and they ran some tests. What started as blue balls turned into testicular torsion as well. I was lucky it was early so they were able to save the boy. After recovery they asked me some questions about my personal bedroom habits and when I told them it took 40+ min to finish by myself and some of my other answers I was also diagnosed with DES (Delayed Ejaculation Syndrome) meaning while I can get hard easy I can’t finish quick.

Never talked to that girl again but currently engaged and she loved the nice guy who always finishes last.

TL;DR Couldn’t finish my first time so faked it and went to the hospital finding way too much out.

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