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TIFU by pretending to be someone else to en entire group of people and accidentally cat fished someone

Starting I want to say that, while none of this constitutes an excuse as everyone is responsible for their own actions, and I am aware my actions were inexcusable, please dont be too harsh at me as I am autistic, ADHD, have been found to have severe dpdr symptoms and C PTSD. My way of coping with things is still not very functional and im working on it.

I had never loved someone before February 5th 2025. I thought I had, but i only had a distant crush on a classmate. However, on February 5th 2025 I met one of the most amazing people ever. At the time I was unaware I had dpdr and Autism. That person had dpdr. We connected instantly but burned out fast as I started having panic attacks over minor things and I think she did too. I remained quite unable to let go for a long while. I still am, but thats not the point of this confession.

Last month, i entered a common gaming club server with an alt account. Initially I wanted to give her a gift anonymously. But when I talked to her as a stranger, she talked about how she was really upset because of me. And I ended up having an extended conversation with her.

That conversation broke me. And i completely dissociated. And another person started chatting with me and I started to chat back. I was in crisis mode for 4-5 days. And constantly talked with that person to cope. It even got flirty. In the end I realized what I was doing and confessed to that person along side with telling them I still love the other person. But people initially trusted my actual identity so much they thought that account was someone else by the same name.

TL;DR:
I, already engaging in questionable behavior, got into a severe dissociative episode and hurt someone I love while catfishing and using someone I met

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