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TIFU - Robot Vacuum Edition

TIFU by not knowing how to dance

I (M25) recently got a new job in Colombia with the IT firm I work for. It came with a promotion I worked really hard for, so I was excited to make the jump.

For context, I’m a white dude from the Midwest who speaks minimal Spanish.

Luckily I have one college friend who is Colombian and he’s been showing me around. I’ve only been here about a month, and there’s definitely been a lot of culture shock… especially with the nightlife. Back home I was never really someone who went out much, but I figured while I’m here I should push myself and experience it.

This past weekend I went out with my college friend and some of his friends. First thing I noticed: when he said “friends,” there were about 15 people. I was expecting maybe one or two.

But the real surprise was the nightclub.

I had never seen people dance like that before. Everyone was grinding on everyone. I was basically just standing there staring at the dance floor in awe, trying to process what I was seeing.

While I was watching, one of my friend’s friends (a very attractive Colombian girl) came up and asked if I wanted to dance. She turned around and said something in Spanish to her friends, grabbed my hand, and dragged me onto the dance floor.

We started dancing, and then she turned around and started grinding on me to the beat of the music.

After about 45 seconds, my brain basically short-circuited. I panicked, mumbled something like “Uh...one second” and speed-walked straight off the dance floor to the bathroom like my life depended on it.I felt like I was going to cream my shorts.

I stayed in there for about five minutes trying to regain my composure while my friend texted me:

“Bro you ok?”

I told him I might have eaten something and I left the club. Reddit, how bad of a fuck up is this? any idea what she might have said to her friends as she took me to the dance floor?

Edit: I do have everyone's socials from that night. Is it worth me messaging her and explaining myself? Maybe clarify i just ate something off hence me going to the bathroom?

TL;DR - Was dancing with a girl at a club in Colombia when I almost had an accident in my pants and had to leave the club

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