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TIFU dafür dass ich damals bescheuert war?

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TIFUPDATE by getting drunk at a housewarming party

An update from https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/ZgXXD3WQGg

A couple days after I posted that, I sent my friend (the hostess) a message:

“Hey [Hostess’ Name]. I’ve been thinking about what happened and I want to apologize again now that I’ve had some time to process everything.

I’m truly sorry for my behavior and for the stress and worry I caused you, your boyfriend, and everyone else there. I know you had to take care of me instead of being able to enjoy your own night, and I’m really sorry.

I also want you to know that this isn’t how I normally behave or how I treat people, and I’m deeply ashamed that this is the impression I gave you and everyone there. I’m not saying that as an excuse or justification at all. I’m incredibly remorseful.

You don’t owe me any forgiveness and you don’t have to respond. I understand if you need space. I just wanna tell you how truly genuinely sorry I am. And if there’s anyone else I should apologize to, if appropriate, I’d be willing.”

It’s been over 24 hours and I haven’t got any response. That’s okay, I don’t expect her to. And like I said in my message, she doesn’t have to and she doesn’t owe me forgiveness. I just wanted to send her a proper heartfelt apology and I won’t bother her with more. I have a tiny hope that she will reply once she’s ready but I accept if she (and probably everyone who was there) won’t ever forgive me. Altho it’s such a shame that I possibly lost some friends.

I still feel very embarrassed and regretful for what happened, but I feel a slight relief after sending her that. I appreciate everyone’s comments for telling me I have a problem. Yes, I do. I don’t deny that. I will re-evaluate my habit and lifestyle since this is a huge wake up call. I don’t think there will be any significant update after this.

Note: I’m a woman in late 20s from Jakarta, Indonesia. Not USA, like some commenters assumed.

TL;DR I got too drunk and fucked up at my friend’s housewarming party and I think she doesn’t wanna be friends with me anymore.

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