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TIFU by leaving a dildo within my dog's reach

My boyfriend(30), 5 month old puppy and I (25) recently moved in with my father to help him take care of and remodel my childhood house. My dad works as a trucker, so he's only home about twice a week and it's a win-win situation for all of us. Anyways, about 3 months ago my partner brought home a extremely life-like, flesh-colored, ~5inch dildo because he wanted to try it on me. It wasn't something I would've ever went out and bought myself, but he brought it home for us and we both ended up liking it. So after using it the other night, we stashed it behind a shelf in the closet near the floor, thinking nothing of it.

Yesterday, both my boyfriend and I worked 12 hour shifts. It was the one day a week my dad would be home and he volunteered to babysit our pup because he adores her. When I came home, I thanked him for watching our girl and asked him if she'd been good. He said that she was, and talked about how much she loves playing "keep away." I responded saying how she stole a fork out my hand the other night and I had to chase her around the house trying to get it back while she was playing "keep away." We both had a good chuckle, I thought nothing about it and I went to bed.

This morning, I wake up after both my Dad and boyfriend have left for work, they always let her out of her cage in the morning to let her hang out while they get ready for work. I walk downstairs to the living room and I find some chewed up plastic. I look closer and it is the dick-shaped package from the dildo. I panic and run upstairs to the bedroom to find the dildo. THE DILDO IS NOT IN THE BEDROOM ANYWHERE. I tear about the rest of the house, looking in every nook and cranny. Nothing. I know that I need to find the damn thing before my Dad returns home. Last thing I need is him finding it first. He's very shy, old-fashioned, and these kind of topics are never discussed. Of course my dad is aware my boyfriend and I have sex, but he doesn't need to know that theres a lifelike, veiny, dildo involved.

I head to the backyard to search. There is a chain link fence where my neighbor has been outside gardening all morning. I spend ~45 mins scavenging the yard. At one point my neighbor asks me, "looking for something?" So now I'm thinking, "fml, he probably saw my dog running around with a dildo in her mouth this morning." I respond, "ohhh, just for a shoe I think my pup took!" I'm beginning to get desperate, weighing my options here of what's worse - asking my neighbor if he's seen my dildo (he mightve seen where it is and can tell me where to find it) or not finding it and a month from now having my dog bring in a dildo from the yard to my dad while they're playing. I can't muster up the courage to ask.

Its now been 2 hours. I start thinking worst case scenario - my dad has already found it. If my dad had already found it while he was dogsitting yesterday, what would have done with it? I check all the garbage cans, nothing. I check the outside garbage......... I see a flesh colored glans of a plastic penis sitting in the trash. I retrieve the dick. It is covered in chew marks, with a peice missing from the base, but the shaft, head, veins - 100% totally intact, undeniably a dildo. My boyfriend confirmed he did not put it in the trash can.

At this point I am mortified. Getting this dildo wasnt even my damn idea, but now my boyfriends off the hook and I'm taking the fall for it. My dads coming home tonight, and I dont know how I'll ever look this sweet man in the eyes without being ridden with embarrassment and guilt. He'll never say anything about it I'm sure, but good lord I'll never be able to forget. As embarrassed as I feel now, I'm sure my dad feels even more so. Maybe one day we'll laugh about this but right now the embarrassment hurts too much 🙃

TL:DR: dog found dildo, dragged it out to my dad, dog likely played keepaway with it, dad retrieved it. I spent 2 hours trying to locate it just to find it in the trashcan with horror, knowing that my dad placed it there.

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