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I'm on medications that make me go a lot. Midway through our road trip I had to go to the bathroom, like spicy Thai food level. I turn on my blinker to get in the right lane so I can get off at the rest stop but the car in the other lane quickly sped up so I missed the rest stop area. If only they knew what I was brewing.
15 miles to the next rest stop I feel the devil boiling in my stomach. I didn't have time. I fucking shit my pants going 65 down the freeway and sat it in for the next 10 miles. Luckily I had some extra clothes since we were taking a trip, but I had to waddle my stinky ass into the rest stop bathroom, throw away my old underwear, pants and change into something fresh. You would not believe the looks I was getting while smelling like a porta potty. My wife spent the next 6 hours calling me Poopy Pants Chanse. FML.
TL;DR I missed the rest stop and shit my pants on the freeway.
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