Skip to main content

TIFU by thinking muscles = more confidence and becoming a typical oblivious idiot

So this happened like less than an hour ago. Saw a crazy gorgeous redhead girl at the store when I was shopping for chicken and ice cream (weird combo but cheat days) in the ice cream aisle and I thought to say "hey I love your outfit" but she looked busy so I just grabbed my thing of ice cream and went to grab chicken. Cut to a few mins later in the longest line I've ever seen at 10:30 at night in a Walmart and she's right in front of me. queue my dumbass opening and closing my phone screen thinking of something to say

Me: Hey, I love your outfit!

Her: Oh my god, thank you so much! I got the shorts from Walmart and the top from Amazon

Me: That's awesome! I was gonna say something when I saw you in the ice cream aisle but you looked busy.

Her: Yeah I was debating on whether I wanted some ice cream but I figured if I can't even carry it to the register I probably shouldn't get it.

Me: Well ice cream isn't so bad as long as you eat it in moderation its not too many calories.

Her: looks at my dumbass holding 6 pounds of chicken and a tub of ice cream Damn you look good, I'm sure carrying that ice cream wouldn't have been a problem for you.

Me: giggles like a fucking schoolgirl Thanks, I'm down like 200lbs since I first started working out.

Her: Yeah you look amazing continues to eyefuck me

Continued conversation about healthy eating and the gym, her blatantly flirting a few more times and my dumbass failing miserably because "oooo pretty girl".

Another moment that like 5 years from now I'll wake up in the middle of the night saying "what the fuck is wrong with me".

TL;DR 6'5" dumbfuck obsessed with the gym (me) fails miserably at recognizing super cute redhead blatantly flirting and added another random "what the fuck were you doing" moment for years from now.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU by forgetting my purse and attempting to get fuel

Not the craziest story but hey. I'm obligated to say this was a few months ago but I cringe every time I go past the petrol station . My petrol was getting low, not dangerously so but it said 27 miles left, (oftentimes it then suddenly drops to about 16 for example, and then 5 and then 0 very fast) I didnt have my purse on me as I just didn't need it... Picked my daughter up from school and then went on to collect my 2 stepdaughters from across town and then set off for home. En route the gauge went to 7 and then suddenly it was 1 so I stopped at the petrol station near our house. The petrol was on 0 as i pulled up to the pump and that's when I realised I had no money. I left the kids in the car at the pump and went in to talk to the cashier, it wasn't mega busy but there was a queue, I'd heard that they can help you if you can't pay for fuel. Like keeping something of yours as security. It was an elderly man and he basically refused to help. At this point i...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU - Don’t do what I did

On Sunday morning Aug. 24th, I awoke to discover a large blind spot in my right eye, which turned out to be what is called wet age-related macular degeneration (AMD). It has resulted in a very significant, permanent loss of vision in that eye. Although I maintain good peripheral vision, whatever I focus on at best is very blurry, and mostly disappears. I can barely make out the large E at the top of the eye chart. If this happens to my left eye I’ll be unable to read or drive. It turns out that I missed the opportunity that I had to prevent this from becoming a serious problem because I failed to report what appeared to be minor changes in my vision. In the weeks prior to August I had noticed that what I knew to be straight lines appeared to my right eye to have a little waviness. I also noticed that the color of my front lawn, which I could see through the window from my recliner,  was subdued, looked almost gray, in my right eye. So I scheduled an eye exam, which revealed the p...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by getting suspended for 2 days by my front office in school.

I (13M) am an African American student at Jeannette junior high who had got suspended for 2 days here. I was in math class minding my business until my teacher had told me to go to the main office, which posed no problem to me. As i went down there, the people of the front office had stopped me and made me get a new ID (yes, we have id's.) so i had asked them if i could maybe do a different alternative and call my mother to let her bring the Id here, even then, the Id isn't that important. So, although i was talking to them in a calm manner and not showing any signs of rebellion, they had threatened to call the police on me without thinking twice before calling my parents. This is where i started getting angry, and even then now the black peers agree that could have been a racially motivated action. They then told me to sit in the office conference room because of that, leading into more anger. They had then called my mother who had came over to the school didn't even let ...
Post a Comment
Read more