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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by making my sergeant think I'm suicidal

Today I went to the DFAC to get a shitty breakfast and ran into my sergeant there. I hadn't shaved and she scolded me for it. I told her I slept in today and would shave before I got to work.

Then the conversation went like this.

Sergeant: "Sleep eh? You like sleeping soldier?" (Who the hell asks were questions like this? Who would say no?)

Me: "Yes Sergeant. I want eternal sleep."

Sergeant: "...Solider, are you suicidal?"

Me: "No sergeant! I want to be alive, just not conscious!" (Why the fuck did I say this? Why didn't I just say I was exaggerating?)

Sergeant: "Not conscious? So... Dead? Soldier, I'm referring you to behavioral health!"

I just told her "Yes Sergeant" after that and now I have an appointment with behavioral health next month. Fuck.

TL;DR: made my sergeant think I'm suicidal because I said I wanted to sleep forever.

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