Skip to main content

TIFU by saying no to a game

Post a Comment

TIFU by thinking my weak little body could handle spice.

Normally when I order “super hot” Indian food, I do it in restaurant. NORMALLY that’s the perfect amount of spice. Just enough to clear your sinuses and induce a mild state of euphoria.

Last night however, I ordered from them on insert delivery service.

Holy fucking shit.

Now I heard that Indian restaurants tone it down for the white people who think they can handle it (perfectly fair). But damn I didn’t realize what problems that could pose lmao

Initially, and much to my delight, what was delivered to me was far spicier than anything I have ever eaten. Past the point where spicy feels hot, just straight up vibrations from your face all the way to the tips of your fingers and toes. Absolutely delicious.

After guzzling down half my meal, my right nostril starts bleeding profusely.

10 minute break, back to nirvana.

Exactly two bites in, my other nostril starts bleeding.

Jam that bitch up with tp and keep rolling coz this shit delicious.

Not even an hour after finishing my meal my stomach starts cramping in a big way. After unsuccessfully rummaging around for pepto bismal, I call it a night hoping for things to improve after rest.

Nope.

I’m up all night tossing and turning like someone is distilling moonshine right into my gi tract.

I remember waking up to take the spiciest shit of my young life at least a half dozen times.

Things have yet to improve

I may or may not be ordering the same dish tonight… idk man it was really good

TLDR: had the spiciest(best) indian food I’ve ever had. My body said no thank you.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU By Fumbling My Gym Crush

I've never posted on Reddit before so apologies if anything is off. I (F) had a crush on a man at my gym for months. We would make extended eye contact frequently, workout in proximity, the usual gym things that get over analyzed when you like someone. He's wildly handsome, but I liked his vibe. A lot. It's hard to explain when someone's energy just hits different but his did. One day he started coming in with a woman. The day I saw her with him, he and I actually stared at each other from across the room for a while, and I turned and walked away because obviously gym rules - that's his girlfriend until I'm told otherwise. The eye contact continues and so does the proximity but I've dialed back completely because in my head, he has a girl and I am no home wrecker. Well, recently, on a Sunday, I was having a real shit day. I accidentally hurt my shoulder so my back day was all off, my body wasn't cooperating, the gym was packed - all I wanted to do w...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by getting called racist for not handing cash to a customer

today I (F18) fucked up by worked a long ahh shift and got put on register. I never hand money in people’s hands as customers have yelled at me for it, and i think it’s germy so I scoot it towards them as a sign of respect. this lady came in and after i did that she goes “Imma need you to do that again and put it in my hand, you did this last time too don’t you know it’s disrespectful” (meanwhile i haven’t worked register in 2 months at said job and didn’t recognize her) so i apologize, and then cuz it’s call off time i go talk to my boss about it and they all agree with me. apparently though she told my keyholder who’s a poc i was being RACIST by not touching her. so i got told i need to do better even though i didn’t do anything. she was insinuating i was a racist. idk if i should quit or what but i fucked up. TL;DR: i’m a dumbass
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by making a joke that landed horribly

I was talking to someone and thought I was being funny, but the second the words left my mouth I knew I had messed up. It was one of those jokes that sounds fine in your head and then just dies completely in real life. Nobody laughed, the mood got awkward instantly, and I could feel my face getting hot because I knew I had just made everything weird for no reason. What made it worse is that I tried to recover from it instead of just shutting up. So then I started talking more, which only made it more obvious that I was panicking. You know that feeling when you can hear yourself getting worse while it’s happening and you still can’t stop? yeah, that was me. I kept trying to act normal, but the whole thing was already gone. After that I just wanted to disappear and pretend it never happened. I’m still thinking about it way more than I should, which somehow makes it even more embarrassing. I really should have just kept my mouth shut for once. TL;DR: I tried to be funny and the joke...
Post a Comment
Read more