Skip to main content

TIFU by saying no to a game

Post a Comment

TIFU By not checking myself before wrecking myself…

TIFU By not checking myself before wrecking myself…

My wife is gone for work so tonight I decided on a simple dinner. I went ahead and threw a frozen pizza in the oven… Once it was done I got 3 large slices on double paper plates (Yes I skipped the step where I allow the pizza to cool. Like who has time for that?). After getting in bed to eat dinner which I don’t normally do but tonight was an exception as I was alone, I decided to pick a show to watch. I decided to watch some Bigfoot show and it must not have been that entertaining because it allowed my mind to wander. I began thinking about the movie big daddy for some reason… And then all of a sudden I remembered “Damn you Scuba Steve!” After chuckling to myself I have a thought… Was scuba Steve a real toy? I honestly had no idea but I had to find out. My phone was all the way across the bedroom on the nightstand so in an excited hurry to find the truth flipped the sheet off of me as well as my plate of steaming hot pizza. Most of it landed face down on my white sheets except for a string of hot cheese across my thigh. I can’t recall the profanity that I screamed but needless to say I knew I shouldn’t of eaten in bed in the first place. So trying to make this fuck up feel more worth it by posting it on here for the world to see. PS: Scuba Steve is a fictional character for the Movie Big Daddy created by Adam Sandler based on a scuba toy he had when he was a kid.

TL;DR Got too excited to find out if Scuba Steve is a real kids toy and in the pursuit of getting my phone for answers I flipped my plate of steaming hot pizza onto the white bed sheets and burned my thigh with hot cheese.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

TIFU By Fumbling My Gym Crush

I've never posted on Reddit before so apologies if anything is off. I (F) had a crush on a man at my gym for months. We would make extended eye contact frequently, workout in proximity, the usual gym things that get over analyzed when you like someone. He's wildly handsome, but I liked his vibe. A lot. It's hard to explain when someone's energy just hits different but his did. One day he started coming in with a woman. The day I saw her with him, he and I actually stared at each other from across the room for a while, and I turned and walked away because obviously gym rules - that's his girlfriend until I'm told otherwise. The eye contact continues and so does the proximity but I've dialed back completely because in my head, he has a girl and I am no home wrecker. Well, recently, on a Sunday, I was having a real shit day. I accidentally hurt my shoulder so my back day was all off, my body wasn't cooperating, the gym was packed - all I wanted to do w...
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by getting called racist for not handing cash to a customer

today I (F18) fucked up by worked a long ahh shift and got put on register. I never hand money in people’s hands as customers have yelled at me for it, and i think it’s germy so I scoot it towards them as a sign of respect. this lady came in and after i did that she goes “Imma need you to do that again and put it in my hand, you did this last time too don’t you know it’s disrespectful” (meanwhile i haven’t worked register in 2 months at said job and didn’t recognize her) so i apologize, and then cuz it’s call off time i go talk to my boss about it and they all agree with me. apparently though she told my keyholder who’s a poc i was being RACIST by not touching her. so i got told i need to do better even though i didn’t do anything. she was insinuating i was a racist. idk if i should quit or what but i fucked up. TL;DR: i’m a dumbass
Post a Comment
Read more

TIFU by making a joke that landed horribly

I was talking to someone and thought I was being funny, but the second the words left my mouth I knew I had messed up. It was one of those jokes that sounds fine in your head and then just dies completely in real life. Nobody laughed, the mood got awkward instantly, and I could feel my face getting hot because I knew I had just made everything weird for no reason. What made it worse is that I tried to recover from it instead of just shutting up. So then I started talking more, which only made it more obvious that I was panicking. You know that feeling when you can hear yourself getting worse while it’s happening and you still can’t stop? yeah, that was me. I kept trying to act normal, but the whole thing was already gone. After that I just wanted to disappear and pretend it never happened. I’m still thinking about it way more than I should, which somehow makes it even more embarrassing. I really should have just kept my mouth shut for once. TL;DR: I tried to be funny and the joke...
Post a Comment
Read more