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TIFU dafür dass ich damals bescheuert war?

TIFU by taking my daughter with me to get my dog artificially inseminated.

This happened in December, my family had decided to let our dog have puppies. So after a bit of research and finding the right stud dog we go ahead and arrange the date, but due to covid the studs owner recommended AI for speed and to avoid prolonged meeting times.

On the day of the meeting out the blue my daughter (8) asks if she could come with me, not really thinking about what was in-store I agreed, we got the dog ready and set off.

When we arrived we sat in the waiting area with our dog and waited for the arrival of the stud, still not knowing how bad the next half an hour of my life was going to be, having done no prior research about how the AI process actually happens.

In walks the very large labradoodle stud dog primed and ready to go!

Now the vet takes control of our dog and offers her up to the male dog only a few feet away, the stud jumps on our dog and goes for it with everything he's got, I guess normal mating type moves. Then after about 30sec the vet whips the stud off a starts franticly masturbating the dog feet away from me and my daughter with no warning!. At this point mouth's wide open me and my daughter look at each other and share a WHAT THE FUCK moment as the vet finishes the dog off in a cup and artificially inseminates our dog.

We left and didn't really talk much about what happened until we got home and my daughter gave the rest of the family a complete rundown of the events, including how enormous the dogs penis was, which my 2 boys (10+12)thought was hilarious and begged to come to the second meeting 2 days after.

I did have a good laugh about it all, but now have to wait until she's a teenager and asks me if I remember when we watched that woman wank off a dog!!

Just to point out for anyone who doesn't agree with dog breeding, I am not a full time breeder it was just a one off. Before even making the decision we had homes waiting for the puppies, 3 of which are now service dogs. Both dogs were extensively heath tested before the mating. Also just to point out in the UK most (not all) shelters will not let you take a dog if you have children. Thanks

TL;DR I took my daughter (8) with me to get my dog artificiality inseminated and together watched a woman vigorously masterbate a dog.

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