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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by trying the ‘pink’ sauce with my family.

Ok, I use TikTok 10 hours a day and just like many of you, I’ve seen that pink sauce that everyone’s trying and I have such a fomo when I see a food trend, so I cough up the 20$ for that sauce and tell my siblings that I’ve just bought the pink sauce (big mistake). Around 1 week later the damn sauce arrives looking like it served in ww2 as it was horribly packaged and some sauce has leaked. As if that wasn’t enough for me not to try it many videos have been questioning the safety of even consuming the sauce since it had milk in it and the labels were misleading. Obviously I tell my siblings that it’s probably a good idea not to eat the sauce since many people say that it’s dangerous to eat but them being no older than 13 insisted that we should at least see what it tastes like. I was hesitant but I soon gave in and tried the sauce. 5 hours go by and no symptoms of food poisoning so it seems like my siblings were right but little did I know, I was about to take the most steamy diarrhea in my life. I feel the urge to poop so I take a seat and let loose as poop slides out my anus but what followed that seemingly normal bowel movement was no other than a demonic creature slithering out of my ass. IT. FUCKING. BURNT. I clinched my abdomen in response to the pain and thought that no one could save but god himself. There must have been an angel looking down on me since my ass went numb and I could finally finished my dumb and when I stood up I could walk without looking like a butt plug is up my anus. I asked my siblings if they experienced any problems after eating the sauce and they denied that they were sick but I have a hard time believing them since their habits of not flushing after using the bathroom says otherwise.

TL;DR: I tried the famous pink sauce and burned my and my siblings ass holes in result of uncontrollable diarrhea.

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