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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by making fun of my girlfriends “O-face”.

Today(yesterday)while we were talking about woman faking orgasms, I had a brilliant idea to make a joke about my very own sexlife. You see I thought hilariously to tell my girlfriend “I never have to worry about you faking it”. When my girlfriend inquired into the reasoning for my statement I then replied “because who would ever fake those faces on themselves”. It gets worse guys because I then imitated her faces to her then and there. Picture the face of someone who had just been holding a giant shit in for a 10 hour plane ride and then the 40 minute car ride to get to their own glorious porcelain throne just to explode with discomfort and bliss while expunging your bowels. The faces she makes are kinda like that. BUT IT GETS EVEN WORSE because after I made the faces I proceeded to describe the faces as I did above. I told her her faces are like someone pooping. She got real mad. Not like at me but she was mad. It blew over pretty quickly as I apologized and told her It’s not a bad thing it’s just a funny quirk she has and I enjoy it because I can tell when I’m doing a good job. But she didn’t make those faces this morning so I really fucked up. I fucked with her mind guys. I’m waiting to talk to her after work but man I fucking hope I didn’t do any long term psychological damage from a poop joke.

TL/DR: told my girlfriend her o-face is like someone trying to poop, she mad she no make poop face after

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