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TIFU by realizing my views of sex are extremely fucked up.

MASSIVE TW!!

Had a conversation with a guy I’ve been seeing about sex. My general views, based on past experiences and relationships, was this. (context: I’m female)

  • the man’s consent matters, but the woman’s is kind of optional

  • you have to let him do whatever he wants because otherwise he has the right to leave or cheat

  • it does not matter if she is enjoying it, if she does that’s nice, but it’s for the man’s pleasure

  • he’s not SAing you if you like him

Cue this man telling me all of that is extremely wrong and my views are very fucked up and something fucked up has happened to me for me to see things this way. I cried, had some big whole revelation, the whole nine yards. Then I asked him why more people aren’t doing pretty much the exact opposite of that and he told me “That is human decency. Everyone is doing this.” So yeah. Wow. My exes are terrible people.

TL;DR: I need therapy.

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