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TIFU by losing my cellphone at the grocery store

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TIFU by reporting my car stolen… and making the cops find it right where I parked it

So this happened a couple days ago, and I’m still dying inside from the secondhand embarrassment I gave myself.

I live in a neighborhood with annoying parking rules. Every other week it feels like there’s street cleaning, construction, or some other reason I can’t park in front of my house. That day, I came home exhausted from work and ended up parking a couple blocks over on a side street. No big deal… or so I thought.

The next morning, I end up waking up late and super disoriented, grab my keys, and head outside to leave for work. My car is GONE. I’m instantly in panic mode. I pace the street. I check up and down the block like 5 times, as if it might magically appear. I even ask my neighbor if they saw anything (shoutout to Lisa, who definitely thinks I’m insane now). After spiraling for 20 minutes, I call the police to report it stolen.

Fast-forward a couple hours: I get a call from the officer I spoke with.

“Sir… we found your vehicle.” “Oh my God, where?!” “Exactly where you parked it. By the corner store on Maple.” (Literally a 4 minute walk)

At that point I’m torn between relief and wanting the earth to open up and swallow me whole. Yep. I had completely forgotten I parked it there the night before. And now I got to pay the impound fee because they towed it as part of processing the report.

So yeah, TIFU by creating my own car theft situation. Cost me $200 and probably put me on the local PD’s “guy who cries wolf” list.

⸻

TL;DR:

Parked my car down the street, forgot, thought it was stolen, reported it. Cops “found” it where I left it. Had to pay the impound. Still cringing.

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