TIFU by underestimating norovirus

I (21M) had been home alone for a few days while my parents were out to see family over new years while I stayed in the country due to work. Unfortunately they both got sick during the trip and when they came home I find out they got norovirus, they were ok so we just kept great hygiene and I tried to stay away as much as possible since I work with food.

Fast forward to Sunday, my final day of three days off before going into work:

17:00, I feel a bit tired while working on a car at our shop, I don’t think much of it and call it a day and head home.

17:15: I’m driving home and feel slightly nauseous.

18:00: definitely feeling sick, have a bucket on the ready next to my bed.

18:30: TIME FOR WAR.

I spew what looks like my previous 3 meals into the bucket, then have liquid diarrhoea like I’m a human garden hose. I try to drink, but nothing stays down.

23:00: at least 6 liters of fluid have been lost (about 8% my bodyweight)

I know I have to drink something.

I know I have to release the demons brewing in my intestines.

I lay there thinking about a game plan, but it would fail miserably.

23:30: I stumble into the kitchen to get more water, I feel myself going to pass out so I ran to my bed and passed out one step short, I bounce off, land underneath the nightstand and hear my dad call out “you all right?” as he stands up to check on me.

I wake up and say “what happened?” -but I knew I HAD to get to the bathroom. I meet him in my doorway, proceed to black out where he catches me while I fall over with open eyes and clenched Voldemort wrists.

I proceed to wake up having shat myself while he yells out to my mom “call an ambulance!”

I say I’m fine but they insist, the emt’s said I’d be fine as long as I could keep fluids down.

12 hours and 8 liters of electrolyte fluid later I had finally gotten back to a semi-normal hydration level.

They said I had passed out due to a lack of blood pressure from the dehydration and that the muscle clenching was normal with hypoxia to the brain.

I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.

Tl;dr:

Thought I could play tough guy with norovirus, violently shat myself and got an ambulance visit.